Stuff the naughty or nice list: I’m abolishing this horrible Christmas threat

"I realise how hard it must be for many parents, who, regardless of how ‘nice’ their kids are, knew that Santa could never bring them much or what they wanted."

I am not a parent who shies away from occasional bribery or shallow threats whenever the situation calls for it.

Now before I’m judged, I’d like to state it isn’t my go-to method of discipline, nor is it preferred by any stretch of the imagination but if I am too tired, busy, stressed or at the end of my tether, it will be utilised.

And whenever the festive season comes along, this is often in the form of the Naughty or Nice list, and reminding my kids that Santa, or Elfie, our Elf on the Shelf, is always watching.

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"I've even pretended to call Santa"

Now I’ve utilised Easter Bunny, Santa and Elfie for a good decade now with my two girls, and I've even downloaded a Santa phone call app that looks as if the big man himself is one of your contacts, and flashes up on the screen with a jingle bell ring tone when calling you which has always been very handy for getting my kids to bed in a speedy manner.

It has been especially great in December when the whole month seems to be kids jacked up on sugar from some celebration they’ve had at school, or with their sporting team, or candy canes sent home from classmates and they just don’t settle down.

I’d actually say that for years the festive threat has been nearly 100% successful for whatever purpose I have used it for, especially in getting my kids to bed on time, getting them to help more around the house in the lead-up to Christmas, stopping arguing with their sister (or me) and just behaving well full stop.

Given my own history with using this, I obviously have no qualms about other parents embracing these strategies because, frankly, we need all the help we can get (and when it comes to Santa, it’s all a white lie anyway, so ethics really don’t count.)

But this year, I have started questioning my methods and decided that it is time to reform. Yes, this year, I am saying no to the naughty or nice list, no to “Santa and Elfie are watching,” and no to any festive-themed bribery.

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"It is not because my daughters have been naughty or nice"

In part, this decision is due to the fact that the cost-of-living crisis is going to impact Christmas, specifically Santa’s gift-load (because yes, even Mr Claus is affected).

And while I would never have guessed that I’d be in this situation, I now have to somehow justify why Santa isn’t bringing the same amount of presents as the years before without it being anything my daughters have done to directly impact this (because of course, that is not the case).

In other words, I inadvertently dug myself into a hole by using these morally questionable strategies and now I need to get myself out of it because everything costs triple.

Being in this situation though, has also made me realise how hard it must be for so many others out there too, who even before the cost of living became so much worse, already struggled and regardless of how ‘nice’ their kids were, Santa could never bring them much.

This realisation makes the whole naughty or nice list so much more problematic in my eyes and even more than my own selfish reasons for not embracing my festive bribery this year, has had the greatest influence on my view.

It has also made me really think about all the other negatives that come with his threat too. Like the fact that the threat is often empty, that Santa is always going to leave your kids presents even if they were the most misbehaved people in existence. And what does that teach them? Nothing. Well, except that they can get away with murder and still get the item on top of their list to Santa. And no one wants that.

While I am still unsure of exactly how I will approach this festive season and all of its extra challenges now I am anti-bribery, at least I still have a few weeks to work out a plan. Fingers crossed it works.

Originally published as Stuff the naughty or nice list: I’m abolishing this horrible Christmas threat