People need to know what it's really like being the default parent

"This sh*t is stressful," the mum says, before listing all the things non-default parents take for granted. 

A mum has gone viral online for nailing exactly what it's like to be a default parent. 

Hint: extremely stressful and underappreciated. 

She does this by explaining all the things that non-default parents might take for granted in their day-to-day lives, aka not worrying about where their kids are 24/7.

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Image: TikTok

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"You better thank the default parent"

"Let me just say this," TikTok influencer Cassey Ahlas begins her now-viral video while sitting in her car. "If you can take any job that works any hours without having to worry about your children or childcare. If you can get up in the morning and get ready for that job, drink your coffee, eat your breakfast in peace, not have to get any kids ready, not have to take any kids to daycare...

"If you can make plans and not have to worry about childcare. If you can plan a vacation and not have to worry about packing your kids, making sure your kids have everything, or finding childcare while you take that vacation.

"If you can do a daily life thing such as go to the grocery store, go to the gym, any of those things, and not have to worry about childcare, you better thank the default parent."

She then explains that, you guessed it, she's the default parent in her family.

Which is a job she says is "24/7, 365."

"This sh*t is stressful. It is the most selfless, thankless, loving job on the planet," she added. "So, if you can do your daily life, every day, and not have to worry about your kids being taken care of, you better thank the default parent."

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"They are fully aware of ALL of this"

Her video now has over three million views, with thousands relating and commenting on her video.  

"I am the default parent. And my husband wonders why I’m always in a bad mood. He has zero stress and I have it all," one mum wrote.

Then this person had a bit more of a skeptical take than Cassey, who gave the non-default parent the benefit of the doubt. They said: "Nah, the non-default parent is fully aware of ALL this. They do. not. care. THAT is the burn of it all."

Then this person shared: "Men can be great providers but fail at being great fathers, and partners."

"They wonder why the default parent isn't ready for more kids," someone else concluded.

And then someone else highlighted that many default parents are also working parents and are just expected to "figure it out."

Originally published as People need to know what it's really like being the default parent