‘My husband refuses to take our daughter to any birthday parties’

“This week I’m sick, but he says he’s not going to take her… she’s been looking forward to it all week,” the frustrated mum reveals.

Pilar Grace

2 min read

June 9, 2024 - 10:05PM

Primary School

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In any parenting couple, sometimes tasks are based on people’s strengths, and sometimes they’re based on the other person’s downright refusal to do it.

I refuse to do the daycare run and have done for the last 12 years.

I’m terrible at getting myself and everyone out of the house on time, the kids cling to me and cry when I try to leave them, it’s a nightmare, and it’s been this way for 12 years and three kids.

My husband is a pro. He plucks the kid out of bed, has their clothes ready and warm from the dryer, he hands them a piece of toast on a plastic plate to eat in the car and away they go.

I am the birthday party parent. I go to all the parties for all the children, I know all the parents, I make all the small talk. I guess when it comes to birthday parties, I’m the pro.

It’s the same in Bec’s* family – she takes her daughter to birthday parties and her husband never does – except Bec isn’t happy with the status quo and wants to share the load.

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The dad refused to go to birthday parties because he hated small talk. Photo: iStock

Dad refuses to take kid to birthday parties

Bec’s husband Simon says he hates birthday parties, the small talk, the games, everything.

“I’ve been taking her since forever,” Bec said in a Reddit post. “She’s in kindergarten, where they still invite everyone in the class.”

This year, Bec has done at least seven parties, but when the latest one came up, she was sick and could barely get out of bed.

Naturally she assumed Simon would take their daughter.

“My kiddo has been looking forward to it all week. Simon says he’s not taking her,” she said.

She told Simon to break the news to their daughter and it didn’t go over well.

“Her pitiful cries were so sad. He told her missing one party isn’t the end of the world, and she’s been to plenty already.”

That’s a hard pill to swallow for a kindy kid, but Bec wondered if she was overreacting. Her daughter had been to a lot of parties already.

Reddit community furious for mum

Parents flooded the comments to share their points of view, and most were on Bec’s side.

“I would be furious,” one person said. “Nobody likes going to kid birthday parties, but all go.”

“He can’t possibly have anything in common with those parents, he’s so much better than them because he doesn’t like small talk or being around happy children,” was another person’s sarcastic take.

“How hard is it to do something for a couple of hours just to make your kid happy?” a third person said.

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It wasn’t actually the case that “nobody” liked parties. Plenty of people chimed in that they enjoyed going.

“I like going to birthday parties. I want to talk to everyone and try to make a friend or two. If you keep going and seeing the same people, that’s how you make a friend,” one person said.

*Names have been changed