‘I’ve had enough of the tripod parent’

Sharenting has evolved into proving you're a good parent online, all while the child at the centre of the content waits for one.

Have a baby, and suddenly you've got 18 years of content. 

Well at least that’s how some of these influencer parents are behaving. 

But in setting up the perfect shot, are the moments that actually matter being missed? 

In a TikTok that recently went viral, a woman named Ashley recounted an experience she had at the beach.

She watched as a mum influencer set up a tripod in the sand, then laid out a picnic blanket and umbrella.

They began to build sandcastles together all while the mum recorded them. 

The tripod parent is getting out of control. Image: iStock

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"This has happened before"

At first, Ashley thought it was a great idea. 

“I was like' oh that’s kind of cute, I wish that I was better at that. I need to record more of me and my kids or I need to take more pictures of me and my kids because a lot of times I forget',” she explained. 

But then she noticed something odd. 

After just ten seconds of building, the mother stopped, checked her phone, and returned to destroy part of the castle.

“She knocks it over, and the kid is like ‘Mum,' but the kid also isn’t super frustrated. It looks like this has happened before,” Ashley said. 

She watched on as the pair began rebuilding. 

While they worked, the mother made promises of swimming and playing in the waves. 

Once she was satisfied with the footage, she moved the tripod closer to the water's edge.

“She kind of splashes her child… she does that for ten seconds again,” Ashley explains.   

Then the mum told her daughter they were finished in the water, despite the girl clearly wanting to stay and play. 

Manufactured memories 

“She goes back to the towel, she sits down and the whole time she's on her phone like probably editing this video,” Ashley recounted. 

The child kept trying to get her mum’s attention, but once the editing was done, the mother packed up and told her daughter it was time to leave. 

As Ashley puts it: “you just took your daughter to the beach for views.”

“It’s one thing to have a pretend life, but it’s another thing to have a pretend life and use your children for views.” 

Ashley is right. 

Childhood shouldn't be made up of filters, cuts and retakes.  

Some of the best memories I have with my child are the ones made before I hit record. 

Where I’m so engrossed by what he’s doing or saying that by the time I reach for my phone, he’s already stopped.

They’re the moments that stick.

The moments that pass too quickly for me to bother setting up a tripod. The moments that aren’t forced or encouraged. They’re organic.

How upsetting for that young girl, just trying to enjoy a beach day with her mother. 

Can you imagine how confusing this all must be for her? How manufactured those memories might feel one day?

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She’s experiencing fun that comes in short bursts. Frame by frame. She’s being taught that joy is conditional. That it only counts if someone’s watching. 

Sharenting has evolved into proving you're a good parent online, all while the child at the centre of the content waits for one. 

I won’t always have perfect footage of my son’s childhood.

When I tell people funny stories about his mishaps and adventures, they’ll have to take my word for it. 

It’ll be a mix of blurry photos, half-finished videos and memories that live only in my head. 

Like the way he once looked at me before jumping in a puddle, how he dances to that one Wiggles song we play on repeat or the way he giggles when he is being cheeky.

And that’s enough. 

Because I wasn’t setting up a tripod. I was beside him.

Originally published as ‘I’ve had enough of the tripod parent’