Flex Mami wants us to speak up about our periods – here’s why

Nothing is off-limits 

Regardless of how open you are with your sex life and political views, there’s an undeniable consensus that no one should know when you’re on your period. That’s something Australian media personality Lillian Ahenkan and U by Kotex want to change. 

Have you ever felt embarrassed talking about the symptoms, side effects and emotional toll of your period? Well, you’re probably not alone. 

According to a recent survey conducted by U by Kotex 54 per cent of young Aussies feel their period is holding them back from feeling – and performing – their best. Now, Lillian Ahenkan – AKA Flex Mami – says it’s time for us to shake off our collective shame and stigma surrounding a bodily function experienced by half of the world’s population. 

Together with U by Kotex, Flex Mami has launched a special edition version of her viral ReFlex conversation cards, designed to spark open and honest conversations about all things periods. 

“There is a theme that's happening here,” says Ahenkan, referencing the findings of the survey. “A set of women are saying that embarrassment is the reason why they don't want to about their period. People are saying words like shame, discomfort, anxiety, worry.”

“In a lot of ways it feels like we're having a cyclical conversation that's not pushing the needle forward, and this year especially, I've been motivated to not only start conversations myself but to partner with pre-established brands and companies who are already doing the hard work and getting the message out to people,” she adds. 

Teaming up with the beloved period brand, Ahenkan is ready to get people talking about their real-life period experiences, beliefs and learnings, “Conversations are the conduit to real change,” she says. 

Image: Instagram/@ubykotexaunz

Real change starts with you

In an age of hyperconnectivity and never-ending dialogue on social media, a topic as vital as periods is still so rarely broadcasted by those with a platform. It’s a reality Ahenkan hopes to change, but like all good revolutions, she’ll have to start small. 

“I think part of the benefit of creating a tool that gets people to have these conversations in their own space means that people stop putting the onus on external people or external conversations to inform their internal,” she explains. 

“It's about creating a level of self-responsibility and saying, I need to be a reflection of the people that I want to be around, the conversations that I want to have, the level of comfort that I want to facilitate for myself and other people, as opposed to being like, ‘I'll just be uncomfortable until a space presents itself’,” she says. 

“No one's coming to save us – in the nicest way possible.”

Flex Mami says it’s time to stop walking on eggshells around the topic of menstruation. Image: Instagram/@ubykotexaunz

Of course, talking the talk is very different to walking the walk – especially when the walk is across the male-dominated office with a tampon in hand on your way to the bathroom. 

But as Ahenkan points out, confidence and comfort only arise from action and practice, “So pick a friend, any friend – and start playing the game,” she says. 

“Comfort isn't something that you just step into – you have to cultivate it for yourself,” she says. “And the easiest thing you can do is start in environments where you're safe.” 

ReFlex Period Talk Conversation Cards, shopflexmami.com

ReFlex Period Talk Conversation Cards

Order here

Rewriting our period dialogue

For Ahenkan, growing up with a forthcoming primary parent (her mother) who spoke openly about how menstruation would impact her life from a young age positively prepared her for the biological, emotional and social changes that a period brings. 

Acknowledging that not everyone has the same kind of experience, she’s designed her new ReFlex Period Talk cards to help users foster a completely new outlook and understanding. Like her previous editions of the card game, Period Talk consists of 25 conversation-guiding questions designed to spark critical thinking and openness. 

“You cannot bypass the real chit-chat, so, the sooner that we develop our verbiage, our comfort, our lexicon, the better,” she says.

“Of all the hard conversations that we need to have, like right now, our period shouldn't even be ranking top five, not even top ten.”

The U by Kotex® x ReFlex Period Talk Conversation Cards are now available here – keep an eye out for restocks!

Originally published as Flex Mami wants us to speak up about our periods – here’s why