Suffering from decision fatigue? Why not take tips from a toddler and live life on repeat

There is a famous children’s book called Guess How Much I Love You by Sam McBratney, which tells the story of two male rabbits, Big Nutbrown Hare and Little Nutbrown Hare, who are presumably father and son, though it’s never explicitly mentioned.

The book begins with Little Nutbrown Hare asking Big Nutbrown Hare the question, “Guess how much I love you?” and continues as the pair use increasing measures to quantify how much they love each other. I know this because I’ve read Guess How Much I Love You every single night for the past year at the insistence of my two-year-old son.

Recent research commissioned by the psychology-based app Noom found adults make about 122 informed choices daily. Credit: Dionne Gain

It’s not lost on me that in agreeing to read this book every night, I inadvertently answer the question: guess how much I love you? Only love would compel any sane person to read the same book every night, especially when there are so many great books to read, books about more than rabbits and love (or other books about rabbits and love, if that’s your flavour).

And yet, each time I gently guide him towards something new (I am hearing good things about Magic Beach!), he refuses to be swayed: “But I like it”.

This rigid dedication applies to most aspects of his life: food (pesto pasta), films (the live-action Peter Rabbit movie from 2018 featuring the voice of James Corden, urgh), and hobbies (building forts). In a world of endless choices, he has decided to disregard them altogether – and couldn’t be happier.

Conversely, I find myself plagued by the opposite problem: decision fatigue. Decision fatigue (or choice paralysis) refers to the idea that the more decisions you have to make, the more fatigue you develop and the more difficult choices can become.

This is especially rampant right now because, according to Dr Barry Schwartz, psychologist and author of The Paradox of Choice, “people are currently operating with far more options in our lives than we need and that serve us”.

Recent research commissioned by the psychology-based app Noom found adults make an average of 122 informed choices each day.

This explains why you spend two hours scrolling Netflix, unsure of what to watch, or find yourself absent-mindedly wandering through the grocery store, unsure of what to buy.

Can’t be bothered cooking? Why not get takeaway? Just be prepared to pick between thousands of options on the UberEats app, each grouped under different subheads such as Places You Love, Order Again, Loved By Locals, Popular Near You, and my personal favourite, Under 15 Minutes. Before long, all this indecision has given you indigestion, and you close the app down and make toast.

To make matters worse, decision fatigue coexists with another uniquely modern phenomenon: fear of missing out. We have been conditioned to believe there is always something better to watch, eat, do or read. It’s not enough to be overwhelmed by too many decisions; we must also make the absolute best one.

I often think about this pressure while watching my son happily go about his Groundhog Day existence. For him, variety is not the spice of life (which makes sense given that he hates anything spicy); rather, there is constant joy in the familiar.

As it turns out, there is a method to this pick-and-stick madness. Studies have shown that in addition to supporting learning, repetition helps children feel a sense of control in a world that often appears scary and stressful.

However, it’s worth noting that when the whole world felt scared and stressed during the pandemic, nostalgic shows such as The Office, The Sopranos, Gossip Girl and Cheers experienced a huge uptick in streaming numbers. For a moment, we all regressed to the terrified toddler stage: waddling around our homes, eating whatever we fancied, rewatching whatever made us happy – and sobbing a lot.

Thanks to Michael Scott for helping us through the pandemic. Credit: NBCUniversal via Getty Images

Might all our problems be solved if we spent less time agonising over decisions and more time appreciating what’s worked in the past? Possibly. Does this make Peter Rabbit a fun rewatch? Absolutely not.

At some point in the future (please let it be soon), my son will inevitably tire of Guess How Much I Love You and a new text will be prescribed for the forthcoming year (please let it not feature rabbits). Until then, I will find comfort in the fact that of the 122 decisions I’ve already made today, what to read tonight won’t be one of them.

Find more of the author’s work here. Email him at [e-mail] or follow him on Instagram at @thomasalexandermitchell and on Twitter @_thmitchell.

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