“Canberra Civic car park, noon last Saturday,” reports Mike Fogarty of Weston (ACT). “Stood behind a delightful teenage couple, both fully decked out in Goth gear. Girl in tattered tights and black face paint. Likely lad, white face paint, had nothing to lose but his chains. I said: ‘Hey folks, too late for Halloween, and too early for a rave?’ Reply: ‘No way, we’re off to have our photo with Santa!’ Youth is never wasted on the young.”
Beggars can be choosers: “The chicken wrap was too big for my appetite, so I offered the boxed takeaway to a homeless man in George Street,” says Wendy Crew of Lane Cove North. “He shyly smiled, then asked ‘Do I have to eat the lettuce?’”
Dave Lloyd of Thornleigh noted the headline “Minns, unions reach temporary truce” in the Herald last week and thought he could better it: “Does ‘Minions reach an agreement’ not have a good ring to it?”
“We still use a landline phone to keep in touch with elderly relatives in the UK,” writes Pauline McGinley of Drummoyne. “I’ve just been to replace my old one, but couldn’t find them anywhere in the store. Eventually, an employee ushered me to a far-flung counter and there, lurking underneath, were four or five boxes to choose from. I honestly felt like I was buying some kind of contraband!”
Even though Republicans have already shut the Gaetz, Tony Moo of Lane Cove still wonders, “Wayne Duncombe (C8), perhaps we should be more kind to Eddie Munster?”
Ray Witherby of Kings Langley thinks that “with a federal election campaign almost upon us, we need some new political buzz-words. Those consistently over-used words: ‘Let me be very clear…’ are code for: ‘I’m going to make this explanation as confusing as possible’. Clarity must be pensioned off. Our political leaders need some refreshing new zingers when they embark on the campaign trail – it might just be the path to victory. I’m thinking that Column 8 is fertile ground for some innovative reader contributions. How about it, readers? It’s time”.
“Having just returned from Taiwan, I can report that there are frequent announcements on public transport asking passengers to please lower their voices and refrain from using electronic devices,” says Craig Forbes of Lewisham. “Being a polite and well-behaved bunch, they do just that. Misophonics’ paradise? If only that could happen here.”
Column8@smh.com.au
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