And so to Victoria’s Central Highlands, and the (not so) hallowed halls of Ballarat Grammar.
Regular readers will recall The Age has published a series of disturbing stories about the prestigious private institution over recent months.
The school, which traces its forebears back to 1877, has storied alumni who include one-time premier Henry Bolte, ABC presenter James Valentine, opera singer David Hobson and AFL star Tony Lockett. The private school’s war cry and school song is Boomalacka, which is also the name of school magazine, which has lately been generating interest for all the wrong reasons.
Ballarat Grammar has a storied past. Credit: Joe Armao
The autumn 2025 edition of the biannual community magazine Boomalacka features an obituary for former staff member Chris Gardner, who was geography teacher from 2002 until 2007. There’s even a photo.
Aw. What a heartfelt way to commemorate the passing of an ex-teacher. Except there’s one teeny problem … Gardner isn’t dead. And was rather taken aback by the news of his unfortunate demise.
“Unfortunately, without any communication or consultation with my family, Ballarat Grammar School has announced my death to the school community,” says a Facebook post written by a very much alive Gardner.
“As you can imagine, I am quite upset about this!”
The erroneous obituary and photograph were quickly wiped from the online version of Boomalacka.
At this point, we feel duty bound to point out that: (a) CBD has, ahem, form in this regard, and (b) in the best traditions of mainstream media – our own sins would never stop us pointing out the misdemeanours of others.
“The school acknowledges and sincerely apologises that a former member of staff was mistakenly listed in our autumn school magazine obituaries section,” a contrite Ballarat Grammar spokeswoman told CBD.
“The school has contacted the person incorrectly listed, along with a member of his family, to personally apologise for the mistake and the impact it caused.
“The headmaster has also offered a formal letter of apology and to place a correction in the next edition of the publication and will continue to communicate with the gentleman to rectify the mistake.”
But in CBD’s eyes, while we are pleased to hear that Mr Gardner is alive and kicking, the magazine is alive and kicking itself.
Dimopoulos versus Groth
Melbourne’s major event spaces are normally a politics-free safe space, so Melebrities of different stripes can congregate in a mutually agreed demilitarised zone while sipping their flutes of Piper Heidsieck (the Australian Open), G.H. Mumm (Melbourne Cup) and Moët & Chandon (Australian Grand Prix).
Major Events Minister Steve Dimopoulos on Thursday at the Melbourne Winter Masterpieces exhibition at the National Gallery of Victoria.Credit: Getty Images
That is until Thursday, when the normally genial Steve Dimopoulos, Victorian minister for bread and circuses that increase our debt pile – sorry, we mean Victorian minister for tourism, sport and major events – said at the launch of the National Gallery of Victoria’s French Impressionism Winter Masterpieces exhibition, “I’ve got to make a political point.”
Cue nervousness washing over the audience, who muttered to themselves: “Must. Indulge. Minister. He’s. Got. The. Cash.”
Sam Groth was in Steve Dimopoulos’ sights at the launch on Thursday.Credit: Paul Jeffers
Dimma’s target was the Liberal Party’s shadow major events minister, Sam Groth, who was most recently in the news for (a) denying accusations he had misused taxpayer funded-cars, and (b) partying with Melebrity Queen Bec Judd at the LIV Golf event in Adelaide.
Dimma took Groth to task for suggesting several months back that art exhibitions didn’t really contribute all that much to major events.
“What an unsophisticated and factually incorrect representation of the cultural and economic power of art,” Dimopoulos huffed.
“Victoria is not a one-trick pony. We don’t just do sport. We do sport, we do art.
“We do so many things well at a global level … and we want all Victorians to enjoy something special in their home state.”
The battlelines are now drawn. Watch these two political lions duke this one out across Melbourne’s premier hospitality tents in the months to come. Champagne flutes at the ready!
Dropping in
It was back to the floor for media scion Lachlan Murdoch on Thursday – the media nepo baby rolled up his sleeves and attended the news conference of his beloved Sydney tabloid The Daily Telegraph.
Given the internal politicking at News Corp reaches papal conclave levels of opacity, CBD cannot surmise if this is a vote of confidence in Murdoch’s favoured editor Ben English, or the boss keeping tabs after a few embarrassments at the tabloid including the infamous stunt gone wrong attempted sting at Cairo takeaway in Newtown.
News Corp boss Lachlan Murdoch, pictured last year, was spotted in the company’s Sydney offices on Thursday.Credit: New York Times
Like father, like son. Rupert Murdoch was not above pulling a boss move such as turning up to the newsroom of The Australian over the Christmas break installing himself at a vacant subs desk and wondering out loud why all his editors were holidaying.
And CBD hears this is not young Lachlan’s first news conference rodeo. CBD was charmed to hear about the blissful ignorance of youth demonstrated by some younger Daily Telegraph staff members on a previous Murdoch visit. Apparently, the Zoomers were in ignorance as to who the great man was.
English told CBD it was hardly remarkable that the person who chairs the company came into the office.
Fair point.
“He always drops in when he’s in town,” English said.
News Corp policy is that staff are expected to be in the office at least three days a week.
Nice to see that extends – albeit occasionally – to the company chairman himself.
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clarification
This story originally referred to a “News Corp source”. It has been updated to say the quotes were from Daily Telegraph editor Ben English.