What can reality TV teach us about money? More than you’d think

Hi, my name is Victoria, and I’m a reality television addict.

Now, I know what some of you might be thinking. Reality TV is mindless, vapid, and brings out the worst in people (and often stars the worst people). And you know what? You’re right. But that’s one of the reasons why people – myself included – love it so much.

Love is Blind contestants Leo and Brittany have shocked viewers with their money discussions.

Another reason I can’t get enough of it is that, so often, the conversations that play out on camera are a mirror to experiences or issues that we, the viewers, have been through ourselves or are currently going through.

Past the fake tan and veneers, seeing discussions about insecurities, vulnerabilities, or hairy topics like money being played out by other people can be extremely helpful and incredibly informative.

Take the latest season of Netflix’s US series Love is Blind, where two romantic hopefuls, Leo and Brittany, discuss their financial nitty gritties – from bank balances, expectations of who pays for what, divorce settlements and potential wills – within just a few days of knowing each other. For most of us, these conversations happen months or years into a relationship, but in the expedited world of reality TV land, they happen within days.

If you’re unfamiliar with the premise of Love is Blind, men and women are dropped into what are single-sex dorms for a number of weeks while they go on speed dates in “the pods” (heavily staged lounge rooms). The catch is the dates are verbal only, and the potential matches don’t meet each other in the flesh until much later and until there is an accepted proposal.

In having the conversation so early on, there was a complete understanding of values, expectations, and goals.

Putting aside the more obvious risks of proposing to someone just two weeks into speaking (and having never seen them in person) and the show’s questionable success rate over its seven seasons, Leo and Brittany’s conversation about finances has become the topic of season 7.

Leo is a 30-year-old art dealer who wastes no time letting his housemates know that he grew up financially comfortable and inherited his family’s business when he was in his 20s. Admittedly, he raises his wealth a little too often, and the low point comes when he offers to let his roomies try on his Rolex watch. But hey, it makes for great TV.

What makes Leo interesting, though, is how he broaches the subject of his finances with 32-year-old Brittany.

In the first episode, Brittany tells the audience, “Some people want to be boss babes and make all the money and live their lifestyle, and that’s not how I want to live. I’m obviously a trophy wife.”

And so, on their second date, Brittany raises a question she has asked other men in the experiment: does Leo believe in splitting living costs evenly with his partner?

After thinking on it, Leo answers, “I don’t know if I believe in paying all of it, but I also don’t think I believe in splitting 50-50 if I’m making more. But I do like the thought of both of us paying something because it feels like we’re both invested.”

Brittany then discloses that in her previous relationship, she was “taken care of 100 per cent” and says she does not agree with sharing expenses equally, in part because women have expenses men don’t – like makeup, clothing and gym classes. As you can imagine, this was the exact moment fans started losing their minds.

Whether you agree wholeheartedly or disagree vehemently with Brittany’s position or Leo’s response isn’t actually the takeaway here. In my opinion, what’s significant is that in having the conversation so early on, there was a complete understanding of values, expectations, and goals.

Reality TV is mindless, vapid, and brings out the worst in people (and often stars the worst people). And you know what? You’re right. But that’s one of the reasons why people – myself included – love it so much.Credit: Shutterstock

And by laying everything out on the table, the risk of confusion, deceit and arguments significantly decreases.

For better or worse (I’d argue worse), money remains an incredibly taboo topic for many people. For that reason, when you enter into a new relationship, it can be tricky to broach the subject without sounding judgemental or as if you’re trying to decide if your new beau is a viable investment opportunity.

But the way a person spends and saves their money can tell you a lot about them. For example, are they saving with a specific goal in mind, or do they live paycheck to paycheck?

Are they generous and happy to shout their mates because they know that they earn more, or do they live frugally or wait for you to pick up the bill every time? Do they speak about the future with clear plans in place or take things day to day?

There are no exact right or wrong answers to these questions. But by looking at them, you can see how, in part, people value themselves and the people in their lives.

And what you’re really doing when you’re talking about money or asking these questions is trying to figure out if your values, goals and priorities align. As Leo admits at one point, “One of my biggest insecurities is that a girl will only want me for my money.”

Given how much of a stressor finances and money can play in a relationship, being armed with such honest information early on is easily preferable to finding out months or even years down the track. As Brittany quickly found, values did not align with a lot of the men there. With that information under her belt, she was able to keep looking for her person.

From the comfort of our couches, of course, it seems insane that Brittany and Leo go so deep and are so honest just a couple of days into knowing one another. But according to a 2020 paper from the US Institute for Family Studies, money is one of the most common topics of argument among couples with young children, second only to housework and chores.

Like all reality TV stars, whether we like Leo and Brittany as people is irrelevant. It’s the transparency of their conversation and their respective honesty about their financial realities and expectations that made for great TV.

Victoria Devine is an award-winning retired financial adviser, best-selling author, and host of Australia’s number one finance podcast, She’s on the Money. Victoria is also the founder and co-director of Zella Money.

• Advice given in this article is general in nature and is not intended to influence readers’ decisions about investing or financial products. They should always seek their own professional advice that takes into account their own personal circumstances before making any financial decisions.

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