‘I love being a man, but it’s tough at times’: Harry Garside

Harry Garside is a boxer best known for winning a bronze medal at the 2020 Olympics. Here, the 27-year-old opens up about his close relationship with his mother, falling in love for the first time, and the joy of sharing his life with someone special.

“Although I love being a man, it’s tough at times because we don’t have the same emotional support systems as women.” Credit: Supplied

My maternal grandmother, Judy, who we called Juju, was a charismatic woman. She had positive energy in spades. She loved to paint self-portraits and many of her pieces are hanging at home. As a child, she kept a red ribbon, and you see it in each of her works. She raised two daughters and died during COVID in 2020.

My paternal grandmother, Nancy, moved around a lot – from England to Canada, then Australia. We were close until I was about six years old. She looked after us when my parents worked and helped us out when she could, but we didn’t spend a lot of time together beyond those early years. Dad’s side of the family bickered and argued a lot. She died when I was 10.

My parents met when my mum, Kate, was 19. She was actually dating someone else at the time. A few months later she split with her then boyfriend and my dad, Shaun, made his move.

Mum had three sons under five by the age of 27. She did an amazing job, but it was full of challenges and stress. My parents didn’t have much money and worked multiple jobs to make ends meet. As the youngest son, I was definitely closer to her.

My brother Josh is five years older than me and Jack is three years older. I fall into the youngest child syndrome – Mum made sure they did everything for me. As a result, I was softer by nature.

I felt different to my brothers and Dad when I was growing up. In primary school, I tried to get their approval through sport, but in my teenage years I confided in Mum more, especially when it came to my first heartbreak.

Mum always had tarot cards, crystals and incense in the house. Us kids would take the piss out of her, but she had a thick skin and could laugh about it. It’s since opened my mind to question things a lot more. She’s the opposite of Dad, who is quite conservative.

I was very fond of my grade 1 teacher, Judy Dinsdale, at Mooroolbark East Primary School. She was amazing and always looked after me and my brothers. She passed a year ago.

My first kiss happened with a girl called Gemma when I was around 11 while camping with family friends on summer holidays.

I had a crush on Catherine McCormack in Braveheart, and on Minnie Driver in Good Will Hunting – I fall in love with her every time I watch it. I also adored Vanessa Hudgens in the High School Musical films.

I had my first girlfriend at 16. Some refer to the first time as puppy love – for me, it was electric and amazing.

I’ve always had close female friends and I’ve known my best friend, Emily, since high school. We talk weekly and message every other day. I’d like to think I have high emotional intelligence. Although I love being a man, and I love the male space, it’s tough at times because we don’t have the same emotional support systems as women.

I’m currently in a relationship. She is an amazing lady who’s been an amazing support for me since the highs and lows of the Paris Olympics and I hope I can be that for her. I love sharing my life with someone and having a deep connection, but chasing big goals has made it hard to maintain relationships, or to be there for someone.

Mum was in the arena when I lost [in the round of 16] at the Paris Olympics. There’s a photo of me crying with her. To see my family in that moment of loss, knowing they’d witnessed me failing, took me back to being a little kid.

I know Mum has my back. As a child, she tried to fix everything for me, but now she’s at a point where she is just there – she can hold my hand and not say anything and I just know it’s OK.

The Good Fight (Simon & Schuster) by Harry Garside is out now.

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