I’m glad Mark Darcy is dead, and I hope Hugh Grant murdered him

Mark Darcy is dead, and Bridget Jones fans are losing it. “Nobody asked for this, give me Colin Firth back,” reads a popular post on X. “Bridget Jones without Mark Darcy, what’s the point?” says another.

The mourning for the long-time love interest comes in response to the recently released trailer for Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy. This first look at the upcoming film opens with an apparition of the 64-year-old actor overlaid with a callback to his iconic declaration of love from the first film – “I like you … just as you are” – before revealing Jones is now a widow.

The reveal was confirmed earlier this year, and first broken to fans in Helen Fielding’s 2013 novel of the same name, but it’s hitting people hard nonetheless.

And, look, I can understand why. This screen romance has been with us for 23 years – and the love for “Mr Darcy” has endured even longer, thanks to Firth’s turn as the hero of the 1995 Pride & Prejudice miniseries, which inspired his Bridget Jones character. The last film, Bridget Jones’ Baby (2016), literally ended with their wedding – a happily-ever-after for a character who is perpetually down on her luck.

But … I’m glad he’s dead. Ecstatic.

Bridget Jones, wanton sex goddess, and a purse-lipped plank of wood.

I’m thrilled as a moviegoer, who will no longer have to feign interest in this large, emotionally constipated plank of wood. I’m thrilled as a fan of Hugh Grant, who’s reprising his role as playboy Daniel Cleaver (and has been lovingly tending to his long-time feud with Firth off-screen). And I’m thrilled for Bridget Jones’ story.

The truth is that, for all the awkward pining and furrowed English brows, they were simply never actually happy together.

Mark and Bridget spend a total of 45 minutes as a couple in the films, and 35 of them involve her skulking outside his house because he’s so distant and obtuse she suspects him of cheating. He ignores her at events full of “balding, upper-middle-class twits”, and they fight about Mark wanting to send their hypothetical son to a “fascist” boarding school where they permanently “stick up a poker up your arse”.

Did she really love Mark Darcy? Or did she just want a date to the turkey curry buffet?

And, even if you believe they really were true love, this is inarguably a better story.

Reviewing Fielding’s 2013 book, The Guardian praised the decision to kill off Darcy, saying “true love is not guaranteed for life” and middle-aged women “are no longer prepared to fade away, alone and invisible”. This enables Bridget to date in new terrain, feel desired by younger men (cue Leo Woodall from The White Lotus and One Day), and see how values have changed.

Colin Firth, Renee Zellweger and Hugh Grant starred in the original 2001 instalment in the adventures of Helen Fielding’s scatty heroine.

I would love for her to realise she deserved someone more interesting all along (Hugh Grant should have drowned him in the fountain when he had the chance) but I’ll settle for a message of self-empowerment.

To say there’s no point to Bridget Jones without Mark Darcy is to miss the point entirely.

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