Simon Taylor
Simon Taylor is a Melbourne-born comedian, who by the age of 24 became a writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Since then, he has appeared on Just for Laughs and became the first-ever Australian to perform stand-up on The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon.
Opinion
Phones
I’m hearing the call, it’s time to switch back to landline phones
Preferring a text message is fine when the topic of conversation is which mall to hang out, but try telling a potential employer to send you a voice note instead of calling.
- by Simon Taylor
Latest
Opinion
City life
State Library should stay open at night for booze-free chats
Melbourne needs more third places. After 6pm, the library should say “laptops away” and turn the space from study zone into a place for booze-free conversation.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Crime
The criminal reason we should bring back blue light discos
How to keep the minds of bored teenagers off pinching a Nissan Skyline or accosting strangers at a train station? The answer is clear to me.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
City life
Sydneysiders are fleeing. But Melbourne shouldn’t get too smug just yet
Melbourne has soared past Sydney as the nation’s biggest city, but that shouldn’t mean just cramming everyone in. That’s what cruise ships are for.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Political leadership
Australia will never elect a Donald Trump – and it’s due to one national trait
When I was working on a cruise ship, a noticeboard poster said it all: “Please remember that Americans consider it acceptable to brag about their kids. Australians do not.”
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
My First Job
I wasn’t hired as a tradie on merit, but I was definitely fired for it
While some teenagers wrote profane things on desks, construction workers immortalised crude phrases on the frames of houses before covering them in plaster.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Infrastructure
Melbourne is a growing city, but will this construction hell ever end?
When you have great roads, they need to be maintained. But maybe authorities could just take it easy for a while?
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
City life
Melbourne, you’re great. But here’s what you need to learn from other Aussie cities
Our neighbours prove Melbourne still has a way to go if we want to be known for more than just our coffee, Spring racing and hipster-brewed beers.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Tourism
Forget military service, Australia needs mandatory farm stints
Consider it akin to jury service – except you get to wear a rugged Akubra and revealing khaki shorts.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Robots
The robots that take our jobs need to pay taxes
If The Terminator is smart enough to time travel, it should be smart enough to submit a BAS statement.
- by Simon Taylor
Opinion
Pets
Congratulations Melbourne, we’ve out-sausaged the world. Let doggy Utopia reign
The laissez-faire approach to our good boys isn’t working anymore. What we need is more dedicated free-range dog parks.
- by Simon Taylor
Original URL: https://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/by/simon-taylor-p536q0