South Sydney Rabbitohs need to blow it up and completely start again

The South Sydney Rabbitohs have sunk to untenable depths - Dane Eldridge writes they must rebuild the club around one man.

NRL 2024 RD03 Sydney Roosters v South Sydney Rabbitohs - Latrell Mitchell, Dejection NRL PHOTOS

COMMENT

With South Sydney’s premiership aspirations officially condemned, it’s time to concede there’s an issue in their bone marrow that cannot be blamed on Vegas jet-lag or an assistant coach.

In fact, there’s a cancer so deeply embedded in the playing group that the only way to extract it is by detonating the putrid carcass itself.

With five straight defeats and 12 losses in their last 16, it is time for decisive action at South Sydney that goes beyond honesty sessions or indicting Lachlan Ilias.

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In simple terms, it is time to start afresh with a ruthless and impersonal clean-out of everyone on the playing roster.

That being, everyone except Cam Murray.

Yes, the term ‘clean-out’ is weightlessly bandied around rugby league in times of crisis, even though it gives no consideration to fine-print stuff, like players and contracts.

But when a club bulging with talent and resources like Souths spends more time under the sticks and in the headlines than in the winner’s circle, the game is duty-bound to present this blunt solution- and I don’t make the rules.

Nevertheless, suggesting Souths bin their entire roster is not as bad as it sounds.

Cam you’re safe … Jason, let’s talk. (Photo by Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)

It’s not to imply the squad isn’t the envy of most NRL clubs, nor to disparage an impressive era where its top four finishes have been as regular as random Hollywood elites in Bunnies caps.

But for whatever reason, this collection of champagne talent now plays like they only met five minutes before kick-off, and it doesn’t look like improving anytime soon.

This was painfully evident in the club’s shameful capitulation on Friday night, with the Redfern outfit flunking 16 errors and 35 missed tackles in their God-awful dacking by the Sydney Roosters.

On a night when the only fight shown in red and green was by the frothed-up fans in the members area, it was a result that further reinforced there is absolutely nothing glamorous about the club right now.

In fact, the only thing associated with Souths to taste success this season has been club legend Sam Burgess, and that was only because he was proven right about the dressing shed being toxic.

Things aren’t great. NRL PHOTOS

Yep, pinpointing the catalyst for the Rabbitohs’ slump has become the Cam Munster’s Groin of clubland mysteries, with nobody sure what it is, how long it will last, and whether it’s been caused by a small slip or something shameful that needs to remain buried.

And without any obvious issue to blame - fitness, tactics or Josh Mansour - it can only mean one thing: the boys ain’t happy.

Whether a civil spat, power imbalance, or perhaps a simple clash of colognes, the Souths dressing shed is as harmonious as an orchestra of emphysemic flautists.

And it leaves the club with no option but to reboot with a new era free of the baggage of the current, and the only way to do this is to thank this playing group for their service and send them off somewhere in to retirement, like Super League or the Titans.

Damien Cook and Cody Walker are contracted to 2025 but appear in drastic need of a fresh environment, Ilias is halfway there, and if Jason Demetriou isn’t prepared to have a frank conversation with Latrell Mitchell about a move to the centres or reserve grade, then he might as well inquire if anyone else is willing to pick up the $1m he’s costing the club annually until 2027.

It’s time for some hard conversations. Picture: NCA NewsWire / Damian Shaw

Then work from Jai Arrow down to Tom Burgess and Alex Johnston and keep cutting names all the way down until you get to Reggie the Rabbit.

Yep post the entire roster on Facebook Marketplace, except for Murray because he is the soul, and maybe Jack Wighton, only because he hasn’t unpacked his bags yet.

In summary, Souths can emerge from this nightmare by centering the rebuild around their gutsy skipper and never speaking of the last nine months ever again.

However, it will require patience.

Rebuilds take time and barring Reggie emerging as a viable halfback - or even more unthinkable, Ilias - it probably won’t be complete in time for next weekend’s match against Canterbury.

But act now, or risk an entire generation of disgruntled podcast revelations.

- Dane Eldridge is a warped cynic yearning for the glory days of rugby league, a time when the sponges were magic and the Mondays were mad. He’s never strapped on a boot in his life, and as such, should be taken with a grain of salt.

Originally published as South Sydney Rabbitohs need to blow it up and completely start again