The key moments from the strangest AFL Draft night in history

Collingwood and Essendon fans might have been nuking their memberships after the trade period. Post-draft, they’ll be lining up to sign on for 2021.

Jamarra Ugle-Hagan with parents Alice and Aaron after being announced as the number 1 pick in the 2020 AFL Draft.

The strangest national draft football has ever seen unfolded with familiar themes that saw some AFL clubs more equal than others.

This annual ceremony of renewal and equalisation had a 2020 wrinkle, with so many players unexposed on the national stage due to COVID-based issues.

It meant Jamar Ugle-Hagan’s 11 NAB League finals goals in 2019 were our last enticing glimpse of his talents before he unites with Aaron Naughton in Round 1 next year.

In a virtual draft that moved with as much speed as plodder Sam Mitchell, the highlights were still easy to identify.

Adelaide did its bit for competition integrity by making the Dogs match a No.1 pick on a player everyone knew was the best and brightest in the land.

Collingwood and Essendon turned a page on the kind of off-seasons that used to see Richmond supporters reach for the microwave to nuke memberships with drafts full of possibility and potential.

The Pies might be making it rain for Adam Treloar by paying nearly $300,000 a season of his foreseeable wage but the five players they took within 31 selections will be a perfect distraction for fans on the verge of mutiny.

No.1 pick Jamarra Ugle-Hagan with parents Alice and Aaron.

And to watch these kids get mobbed by their families when their names were announced made you realise how long they have lived this dream amid an uncertain 2020 season.

When has Zoom ever made a meeting more interesting or captivating?

On Wednesday night it was the most unlikely hero, as Fox Footy’s telecast featured a drafted player getting assaulted in sheer euphoria and jubilation every five minutes by his assembled family on the couch.

Yet as usual the same old problems compromise what in theory should be a process where the strugglers restocking their lists with a vast array of incredible kids.

The best junior talent in the land went not to the worst team but a club that was a goal away from the top six in 2020.

No one doubts the Western Bulldogs’ investment into Jamarra Ugle-Hagan’s development and yet for him to be taken off the draft table for 17 clubs is the ultimate symbol of a broken system.

Three and a half bloody hours for 53 drafts picks. But 20-minute quarters is too long.

— Sam Landsberger 🗯 (@SamLandsberger) December 9, 2020

Let's just knock over the rookie draft while we're at it. Why wait until tomorrow ... (I am kidding).

— Glenn McFarlane (@MaccaHeraldSun) December 9, 2020

The Framlingham-raised key forward was linked to the Dogs because of his indigenous heritage via their Ballarat zone, but surely he would still have gone at No.1 without their careful tutelage.

Thankfully, having spent so much time allowing these draft rorts and loopholes the AFL will allow the first 20 selections next year to be uncompromised.

Sydney was able to take WAFL man-child Logan McDonald with the No.4 selection then match a bid for quicksilver midfielder Braeden Campbell with the very next bid given his Next Generation Academy links.

Family and friends were delighted when Reef McInnes’ name was called out.

Gold Coast’s best work was done pre-listing likely first-rounders Alex Davies and Joel Jeffrey given their list dispensations, with the AFL likely wishing it could be an Indian giver on draft allowances that now look overly generous.

Clubs like Gold Coast would counter that when has the national competition ever been fair anyway?

Victorian Archie Perkins, who landed at Essendon, caused a draft-day stir when he freely admitted he was a flight risk if picked by an interstate club.

Yet the AFL will surely do absolutely nothing about that draft compromise because they didn’t when soon-to-be Bulldog Bailey Smith did exactly the same thing two seasons ago with no ramifications.

For those downtrodden Essendon fans Perkins has movie star good looks and the Jake Stringer-esque capacity to make something from nothing in the forward line.

As for all 402cm combined of Nik Cox and Zach Reid, the Dons will never find a pair of two-metre key-position players to kick the ball better or show more athleticism (Dustin Fletcher was only 198cm).

Collingwood’s off-season was just as miserable but on Wednesday night it found a narrative for a summer of improvement.

Instead of having to match an early bid for NGA selection Reef Mcinnes it landed Jack Henry’s brother Ollie as a clever mid-forward (No.17) then Jackson Macrae’s brother Finlay (pick 19).

By the time they took their fifth selection within 31 picks — with Nick Daicos to come next year — this draft had served its purpose as the perfect summer distraction after all the trials of 2020.

Originally published as The key moments from the strangest AFL Draft night in history