If You Don’t Mind Umpire: Quirky and left-field observations from 2014 AFL Brownlow Medal
SOME of the quirky, left-field and bizarre observations from the AFL’s night of nights — the 2014 Brownlow Medal. HAVE YOUR SAY
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ON Monday night, 1188 Brownlow Medal votes from were counted across the 23-round home and away season.
But what did the umpires get wrong?
Read on as we deliver the quirky to the downright bizarre from football’s night of nights.
LEWY, LEWY
There was an early hint as to why Jordan Lewis was going to battle to take home Charlie — and it didn’t get much better until it was far too late.
His 37-touch effort against Fremantle in Hawthorn’s Round 3 demolition job at the MCG not only missed the three predicted by many, he missed out completely with regular vote magnet Sam Mitchell nabbing top honours.
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There’s no doubt Lewis was among the most improved of the established stars this season, but as is often the case, there’s a definite lag time between that rise and the votes aligning — especially when there hasn’t always been a lot of love in the relationship.
His first vote didn’t come until Round 10 with two in the Hawks’ loss to Port Adelaide and by Round 18 he was only on three with not even 35 touches against Sydney enough to warm the umps’ hearts.
Lewis finished strongly, however, polling 15 votes.
BEST OF THE BESTS
He was already Brownlow royalty, but Gary Ablett confirmed it when he surged through a major Medal barrier.
His 13th vote in Round 7 took him to the magical 200 career votes mark, becoming only the fifth player to reach that milestone.
At that point, his 14 votes was the most ever by a player at that point of the count — a flow rudely interrupted by the Round 8 bye.
Gazza’s fifth best afield for the season in Round 9 was his 46th of his career, edging him past Robert Harvey for the record.
And by the time his season-ending injury in Round 16 left him stranded on 22 votes, he stood on 209 — only behind Gary Dempsey (246 but 218.5 adjusted to one umpire) and Harvey (215), going past Chris Judd (203) and Leigh Matthews (202).
ANY DANGER?
Patrick Dangerfield didn’t have his best individual season — but his excellent polling form continued unabated.
The star Crow polled three votes in four consecutive matches between Rounds 5-9, with the Crows having a bye in Round 8.
Dangerfield was remarkably awarded three votes in Round 7, despite gathering 25 disposals in his team’s embarrassing three-point loss to Melbourne — highlighting his vote magnetism.
BERNING BRIGHT
Paul Roos’ Demons faced intense criticism following their miserable and defensively focused performance against Collingwood on Queen’s Birthday Monday.
But Bernie Vince was certainly smiling after the votes were revealed.
In one of the most forgettable games of the season, the Dees only managed 3.10 and lost to the Pies by 33 points.
Yet Vince’s performance caught the eye of the umpires, polling three votes after booting one goal from 25 disposals.
SPANG TIME
Cult Hawk figure Matt Spangher’s transformation took another step forward last night, polling his first Brownlow vote.
The utility polled one against former side West Coast in Round 12 after collecting 22 disposals and taking 10 marks.
FLETCH LIVES
Clearly no sense of occasion by the umpires towards Dustin Fletcher who celebrated his 39th birthday with nine marks and 25 touches against the Bulldogs in Round 7 — but came up empty in the votes department.
DERM’S MAGIC SPRAY
Much was made of Herald Sun columnist Dermott Brereton’s hard-hitting words against a couple of much-loved Kangas this season.
But apparently they had the desired effect on Nick Dal Santo.
When Dermie served up a spray of Dal’s work rate after Round 1 against Essendon, the former Saint responded with a two-vote effort against the Bulldogs the following week after 32 disposals.
When he called him lazy before Round 16, he responded with a lazy three against the Hawks.
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MY EARS!
WHEN Meatloaf exited the MCG in 2011, AFL fans thought they had seen — and heard — the last off-key performance by an artist of yesteryear. Well, not quite.
Boom Crash Opera kicked off the Brownlow coverage with their hit song The Best Thing.
But it certainly wasn’t The Best Rendition of The Best Thing, with lead singer Dale Ryder missing as many notes as he hit.
Unsurprisingly, only light applause greeted the last chord — a little boom, some crash but certainly no opera.
Was the guy that hired Meatloaf in charge of entertainment tonight? #Brownlow @AFL
â Alli Seaton (@AllisonSeaton) September 22, 2014
Boom Crash Opera is the worst name for a band with a sense of pitch. #Brownlow
â Geoff Orton (@GeoffsOpinions) September 22, 2014
NO-STRIFE FYFE
The most debated suspension of the season didn’t have an immediate on Fremantle’s Nat Fyfe.
The star Docker was controversially suspended for his bump on Gold Coast’s Michael Rischitelli in Round 3, consequently ruling him out of medal contention.
But the umpires put the incident aside when awarding the votes, with Fyfe polling one vote for his 29-disposal effort.
ROCKS OFF
It’s going to take a bit of time for Lions leather magnet Tom Rockliff to unleash his true Brownlow potential if last night’s count was anything to go by.
On the same weekend as Bernie Vince’s 41 touches earned him three against North despite a 41-point loss, Rockliff’s 44 disposals and 12 tackles against Fremantle in Round 14 could only earn him two votes.
BEWDY BONTY
He might have missed goal of the year, but Marcus Bontempelli picked up the three votes for his magical Etihad Stadium goal against the Demons in Round 15.
But if you missed seeing the goal the first time it was shown last night, it wasn’t critical as it was replayed approximately as many times as Dr Edelsten has had different Brownlow dates over the years.
NO MEDDLING
Seems the umpires are largely on the same page as those determining some of the major intra-game medals.
Although Hamish Hartlett went voteless despite winning the Showdown Medal in Round 2, most of the others went according to the off-field script.
Gary Ablett picked up three in winning the Marcus Ashcroft Medal in Round 3; Dane Swan got three for his Anzac Medal in Round 6; Leigh Montagna the same for his win Anzac Medal win in New Zealand.
Freo’s Lachie Neale added three to his Round 7 Ross Glendinning Medal, while the umps went close to matching the three-way tie for the Yiooken Award in Round 11 with Jobe Watson, Ben Howlett in the right slots, but Brent Stanton nudging Brendon Goddard for the single.
In Round 15, Sam Jacobs matched his Showdown Medal with three, while across the Nullarbor, Stephen Hill picked up three alongside his Glendinning Medal.
SPEED THRILLS
ANDREW Who?
Right from the start, new AFL boss Gillon McLachlan impressed with not only his player knowledge, but his speed of vote delivery.
One of the best first-up performances in years — a sure sign of a bright vote-reading future.
However, it didn’t take long for the time-honoured “Demetriou Delay” to make its first appearance with a couple of pregnant pauses on the “J” before the elaboration.
BIG BAGS REWARDED
HALLELUJAH! The umpires still notice the big boys inside forward 50.
West Coast’s Josh Kennedy and Richmond’s Jack Riewoldt were both rewarded for their respective 11-goal hauls against GWS in Round 8 and Round 10, receiving maximum votes from the umpires.
A mini-win for the big boys. Although it took 11 goals each to earn the victory.
GUTSY JONES
MELBOURNE only won four games during the home and away season, but that didn’t stop Nathan Jones from racking up the votes.
The Demons co-captain polled 10 votes from the first 13 rounds, three of which came against Richmond in Round 9.
A tremendous effort from a gutsy, charismatic player.
Originally published as If You Don’t Mind Umpire: Quirky and left-field observations from 2014 AFL Brownlow Medal