The unrelenting noise in restaurants and cafes has become a number one complaint | Goers

I wish restaurants had much louder music and much more noise... said no one, writes Peter Goers.

There are many things no-one ever says.

Such as - I really love tofu, I wish this cold sore was bigger, aren’t we lucky we’ve got white ants and salt damp, there should be more TV commercials and they should be louder, it’s so easy to drive along South Road, I love getting stuck in traffic, isn’t Donald Trump a nice man, Matthew Nicks has brought great success to the Crows, we should get rid of the Adelaide Parklands, oh good, our council rates have increased, those elite private school fees are so cheap, PM Scott Morrison was so wise to take his family on holiday to Hawaii during a national bushfire crisis, everything’s so affordable these days, we need less public transport in Adelaide...

The unrelenting noise in restaurants and cafes has become a number one complaint writes Peter Goers.

And here’s something else no-one has ever said - I love agonisingly slow service in restaurants and I wish restaurants had much louder music and much more noise.

The noise one often has to endure at many eateries is vexing and off-putting.

You go out for a nice meal with colleagues, friends or family or a date or romantic tryst with your partner, or someone else’s partner, and you struggle to hear a word anyone is saying and you can’t even hear yourself think.

The unrelenting racket in restaurants and cafes has become the number one complaint.

It has overtaken complaints about slow and poor service. We have to listen to the noise but restaurateurs and cafe owners seem deaf to complaints about noise they cause. Why do they imagine that overwhelming noise equals enjoyment? A busy dynamic is good but noise pollution is bad. Too-loud music does not equal ebullience.

We invest in the experience of good food shared and conversation and companionship. Then you can’t hear or be heard. Food unites us. It enriches and changes culture, society and taste. Without food we die and without conversation and camaraderie we might as well be dead. Why can’t food, service and patronage be honoured by subtle ambience rather than diminished by intrusive noise?

Stop the music. Stop the noise.

It’s not helped by bad design, bad acoustics and the lack of soft furnishings including carpets. Often there are open kitchens. Often there is music you don’t want or need, blaring at you.

We pay to shout at people over a meal. Everyone has to shout to be heard and this creates even more din over dinner. Restaurants and cafes are closing though lack of business in tough times. The noise issue is a contributing factor in this sad decline. Patrons often ask for music to be turned down and this request is often ignored. You can vote with your feet and go to a quieter eatery – if you can find one.

Excessive, intrusive and annoying noise can kill and harm. It can increase your heart and breathing rates, which leads to stress which can affect immunity, digestive function and even the reproductive process. It can give you headaches, anxiety and depression. So ambience in a restaurant can lead to an ambulance.

We are now shouting a meal and a round of drinks - literally.

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THE Illuminate Festival might be very nice but what does it cost the taxpayers? The SA Government and those in charge of this winter arts festival have continually and resolutely declined to tell us how much money is given and received, pleading “commercial in confidence”.

Should public funding be kept secret?

The main show of this year’s Illuminate was Fire Gardens in the Botanic Gardens. It’s not a new company or concept to Adelaide festivals - it’s a retread - and was widely criticised by many punters. The Illuminate Festival is very quick to announce its success and value to SA but it and the SA Government will not tell us what it costs us. Is it $6m or $8m or $50m?

Perhaps Illuminate and the government can shine a light on this. Light, like truth and transparency, brings confidence.