Family of Reynella East College student Jayden Daff shares pain of son’s bullying death

The family of an Adelaide schoolboy who took his own life after a vicious rumour at school have shared their pain three years on.

Sally Daff's 16-year-old son Jayden took his own life in 2022 after sustained bullying by school peers. At her Morphett Vale home. 7 March 2025. Picture: Dean Martin

Sally Daff said there were three chances to save her son before he took his own life on February 28, 2022 – one day after his 16th birthday.

It was the culmination of sustained bullying for more than two years, including cruel rumours of a sexual assault, and interventions by his family, school, hospital and counsellors.

“I wish I could throw it all at those kids, but what’s the point? What would that achieve in the end?” Ms Daff told The Advertiser.

The 52-year-old Morphett Vale mother keeps a portrait of her blonde, smiling son in the living room, and a display cabinet of mementos, including a kitchen apron.

An aspiring chef, Jayden ran the Reynella East College coffee cart and worked at Wirra Wirra Winery kitchen, where the bell tower rang 16 times after his death.

“Even making something simple like smashed avocado on toast, he would put all his love and effort into it,” Ms Daff said.

Sally Daff said there were three chances to save her son Jayden before he took his own life on February 28, 2022 – one day after his 16th birthday. Picture: Supplied

Looking back, the “beginning of the end” was at a party with friends in late 2020, when Jayden, having been drinking, jokingly asked a female peer if he could touch her bottom.

She said yes, but within weeks, word of the brief encounter travelled among students, falsely characterised by other students, who weren’t there, as sexual assault – then rape.

A few months afterward, the person reportedly denied the allegation and later even attended his funeral, but by then the rumour mill began swirling.

When the teasing began, she worked with the school to figure out strategies, but eventually Jayden began skipping classes altogether.

An Education Department spokeswoman said “(Reynella East College) worked extensively with Jayden and his family”, and he attended in-school counselling sessions, had learning adjustments implemented, and was encouraged to visit a GP for a Mental Health Care Plan, which he did.

Sally Daff at her Morphett Vale home. Picture: Dean Martin

“I think he learned to keep the pain from us better... there wasn’t this big change between then and when he died,” Ms Daff said.

“I explained to him that I knew depression, I lived it for most of my life, and I said the only thing that’s kept me really going is you guys... I wish I could go back and tell him all that again.”

In May 2021, Jayden told his sister Alisha, 23, he had been cutting himself.

“It was hard to see because there was a lot of blood, I couldn’t see how deep the cuts were... there were a lot, probably around 20 all across his legs,” she remembered.

At the Flinders Medical Centre ED, his wounds were deemed non life-threatening, and staff referred him to the Women’s and Children’s Hospital mental health unit.

Sally with daughter Alisha Thon-Daff, 23, her 1 year old son, Laykin, and Ellie. 7. Picture: Dean Martin

He was contacted the following day, and clinicians worked with his family on a safety plan.

Jayden also sought out a Headspace counsellor, but according to sister Rebecca, 30, he never received a follow-up call, which a staff member later told her should have occurred.

“I really just had a fit and told her it wasn’t good enough – he’s a self-harming suicidal teenager, how does he not get your attention?” she said.

“He wasn’t shy, he told them about all his problems – how did that not get triaged better?”

A Headspace spokesman said that the organisation could not discuss individual cases.

At 1pm, on Jayden’s last day, Sally discovered her son’s body and let out a scream that alerted the whole family.

“He was outside, walking around the pool, taking clothes off the line, he gave me no idea he needed me to talk with him... He just decided this was the day, he was going to do it,” she said.

Jayden Daff woke up early to operate the school coffee cart at Reynella East College. Picture: Supplied

“I was walking down the hall, and I opened the door, and looked at him, and I just went, ‘You did it, you actually did it’. I gave him CPR but I knew it was already too late.”

The Daff family is meeting with Education Department chief executive Martin Westwell in early April to discuss how schools can help prevent a repeat tragedy, and to consider their request for a permanent memorial at the Reynella campus.

Above all, Ms Daff wanted parents to be part of the change.

“There’s plenty of parents out there who just seem like they don’t pay attention to what their kids are doing at school,” she said.

The 52-year-old Morphett Vale mother keeps a portrait of her blonde, smiling son in the living room, and a display cabinet of mementos, including a kitchen apron. Picture: Dean Martin

“Jayden was never a problem student and he deserved to be listened to, and he deserved a lot more than what he got.” Picture: Dean Martin

“But so many kids go through something similar to Jayden and they’re just supposed to accept it as part of the school experience.

“You have to come down on (the bullies) hard, and you as a parent have to know what your kids are doing and step in.

“We just hope that this opens everyone’s eyes, teachers, parents, kids, to what’s happening to these adolescents, because they’re going through so much crap in their lives already.

“Jayden was never a problem student and he deserved to be listened to, and he deserved a lot more than what he got.”

Lifeline: 13 11 14. Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636.