Dinah Thomasset using her own mental health struggles as a mother to help others through The Villagehood

The suicides of three Adelaide mums in three months this year highlights the darker side of motherhood, and where groups like The Villagehood can help.

At her lowest point, Dinah Thomasset remembers lying on her bathroom floor thinking ‘I don’t want to be here’.

Two days later the chronically sleep-deprived mother-of-two was hospitalised with severe pain and she says it saved her life.

“I remember crying on the bathroom floor and thinking ‘I don’t want to die but I don’t want to be here. I want to be somewhere else’. And then I got sick,” she said.

“For a couple of hours (in hospital) I was on my own, away from my kids, and I thought I was going to die actually.

“I was so deep in my depression and everything was scary and dark.”

Dinah Thomasset with her daughter Maeva, 4, and son Noah, 7, at West Lakes library. Dinah started The Villagehood, a support group for mums, in 2020. Picture: Naomi Jellicoe

Ms Thomasset said blood tests suggested potential liver cancer but when a doctor told her that the situation was not life-threatening she had a realisation.

“The idea that I might die stopped me from wanting to die,” the 42-year-old said.

“I realised all the expectations I was putting on myself were too much. Loving my children was enough. That changed everything for me.”

Since that moment four years ago, Ms Thomasset has gone on to launch a support group for Adelaide mothers, called Villagehood Australia, and is lobbying federal Health Minister Mark Butler for more resources to prevent maternal suicide.

This year she has been told of three Adelaide mothers, in their late 30s and early 40s, who took their lives in the space of three months. Other women have related “near misses” when they have seriously considered ending their lives.

“At Villagehood Australia we try to prevent that happening by supporting the mothers, making them feel that they’re not alone,” Ms Thomasset said.

“But we need people to be aware of the darker side of motherhood because it’s real, it’s there and mums are so worried to talk about how they feel.”

Most new mothers are screened for signs of post-partum depression or anxiety if they attend a six-week check up with their GP or obstetrician.

Those who are struggling with severe illness can be admitted, with babies aged up to 12 months, to Helen Mayo House at Glenside for intensive treatment.

SA Health data shows at least 670 parents have been admitted since 2014 – including 150 who were aged 16 to 25. After her release from hospital Ms Thomasset saw a GP who referred her to a psychologist and she was diagnosed with post-natal depression.

She and husband Shane sought a sleep consultant to help their daughter Maeva, who was about one-year-old then.

And Ms Thomasset returned to her birth country of Morocco where she “cried and cried and cried with my mum”.

Dinah started The Villagehood after her own mental health struggles as a mother. Picture: Naomi Jellicoe

Being back with her “village” – including eight aunties – made Ms Thomasset realise “we’re not meant to be doing this (parenting) alone”.

When she returned to Adelaide she launched Villagehood Australia, in March 2020 – one week before South Australians went into lockdown for the first time during the COVID-19 pandemic.

Since then it has grown to offer weekly programs for new mothers and their babies in Adelaide’s western suburbs, including parenting tips from expert speakers, music, exercise and coffee catch ups.

“I wanted to create a space for mums to go where they feel supported and loved,” Ms Thomasset said.

“It’s connection, it’s getting out of the house and talking to other mums.”