SA Election 2018: The Off The Record Awards
THEY’LL face their ultimate judges tomorrow - the people of South Australia. But for now, we bring you the 2018 Off The Record Awards.
SA 2018
Don't miss out on the headlines from SA 2018. Followed categories will be added to My News.
THEY’LL face their ultimate judges tomorrow - the people of South Australia. But for now, we bring you the 2018 Off The Record Awards.
The Pinocchio Award
Couldn’t separate the contenders, so a joint award to Labor and Liberal after the Electoral Commissioner found both parties had misled the electorate this week.
The Tim Marcus Clarke Award
For dodgy numbers – How much will South Australians save on electricity bills if the Liberals arein government? Well, pick a number, any number. As long as it’s not the $302 the Liberals had claimed their policies would deliver.
Come to Jesus award
To Labor’s Transport Minister Stephen Mullighan for a preference deal with the God-botherers at Cory Bernardi’s Australian Conservatives as he attempts to hang on to his marginal seat of Lee.
Andrew McLeod/TYSON EDWARDS I’m not talking to him gong
To Steven Marshall for declaring early that under no circumstances would he be negotiating with Nick Xenophon, even if he needed help to form government.
The Dead Sea Scroll Ancient History Parchment
To Jay Weatherill for digging up a briefing note from the mid-1990s to suggest the Liberals had a plan to sell off the Queen Elizabeth Hospital. A runners-up award to Treasurer Tom Koutsantonis for his obsession with the ETSA sale of the late 1990s.
The ‘I used to love her, but it’s all over now’ award
At one time Rob Lucas worshipped the GST. But that was when he was Treasurer a long, long time ago. Now he uses it to mount scare campaigns against Labor. He’ll love it again by Monday if the Libs win.
Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you
The ever-mysterious Sally Zou tweeted a picture of an enormous cheque made out to the Liberal Party. Adding to the intrigue the full amount was $1,212,018. When you break it down as a date – 1/21/2018 - just happened to be Steven Marshall’s 50th birthday. The Libs however say the cheque never arrived.
Michael J. Fox award for time travel
Steven Marshall needed to buy a time machine, preferably a Delorean, and head back to 2014 and remind himself not to say “Vote Labor”. It still looks awful.
The reverse Voldemort award
JK Rowling’s terrifying character in the Harry Potter series was referred to as “He who must not be named’’. Jay Weatherill has performed the exact opposite trick with Elon Musk. “He who must be named at every opportunity, even when not asked about it’’. Did you know Musk’s company Tesla has a battery at Jamestown?
An award for the high-pitched sound only canines hear
Following in murky tradition of 2014s racist “Can you trust Habib’’ flyer, the Labor Party tried its hardest to imply Steven Marshall was some kind of Manchurian candidate because of his relationship with Sally Zou.
Danny Green ring for too many blows to the head
Goes to Danny Green, not necessarily for his endorsement of Leon Bignell (which Off the Record is sure was unrelated to the millions the state government threw at him to fight at the Oval) but for his spruiking of the “great state of Adelaide’’.
Specsavers Colour Blind glasses
To Leon Bignell who sees colour as no impediment to his electoral success, ditching traditional Labor red (as well as the ALP logo) to embrace the Liberal blue in his marginal seat of Mawson.
The Baldrick award for having a cunning plan
A lawyer by the name of Ash Bidhendi contacted a reporter at The Advertiser. He was digging for dirt on Nick Xenophon. He admitted he was doing it to help Hartley candidate Vincent Tarzia. It was more Johnny English than James Bond.The Law Society took an interest, saying it would “consider the matter’’. Tarzia denied all knowledge of the stunt.
The don’t ask, don’t tell award
Newland MP Tom Kenyon thought he was being “cheeky’’ when he hit up Steven Marshall’s friend Sally Zou for a little spare change but ended up embarrassing his boss Jay Weatherill who was in the middle of demonising Marshall over his association when the news leaked out.
One Direction Grammy for lifetime achievement in music
Nick Xenophon and that ad. You may or may not have regard for Xenophon’s capability as a pollie, but one of the few things the electorate can agree on after the last four weeks is he shouldn’t be allowed to ever sing again in public. Yes, that includes karaoke.
Bette Midler Wind Beneath My Wings award
Another gong for Jay Weatherill who believes SA’s wind and sunshine will power 75 per cent of the state’s electricity needs and lift him, emissions free, into another term. If only the state could harness all the hot air generated in North Terrace.
Agatha Christie mystery prize
A clear win by the spooky GhostofTomPlayford (@RealLibInsider) Twitter account, which some Liberal insiders actually thought was run out of Koutsantonis’s office. This was strongly denied by his spokesman, David Russell, when we asked this week. So, who is the Ghost who talks?
OFF THE RECORD - THE SA ELECTION PODCAST.
Ghost of Xenophon to haunt new Upper House
SA Best Leader Nick Xenophon has been vanquished — but two MPs elected on his ticket will play a huge role in supporting or blocking the new State Government’s agenda. Our State Political Editor explains what the Upper House arithmetic means for Steven Marshall’s policy priorities.
Long, hard look in the mirror can prepare Labor for future
NEW Labor Leader Peter Malinauskas has changed the party’s image, but a fundamental review of its stand on key issues like the economy and energy are crucial for a real political rebuild, writes Daniel Wills.