What you said about Rebecca Whitfield-Baker’s call to end the ‘boys are bad pile-on’ |

When Sunday Mail columnist Rebecca Whitfield-Baker warned “boys are bad” hysteria had gone too far, the response was decisive. Have your say.

• Hysterical anti-boys pile-on is a grave mistake

One of the big stories in Adelaide last week was the scandal erupting around an alleged misogynist “fines” system organised by male footy players at the city’s top-dollar Pembroke school.

The revelations ignited a storm of controversy but Sunday Mail columnist Rebecca Whitfield-Baker argued some of the reaction went too far and risked demonising all young men.

“The vile and brutal stories such as that experienced by Queensland mum Hannah Clarke, who was burnt to death in 2020 along with her three young children in their car – set alight by her estranged husband. It is sickening and impossible to imagine,” she wrote.

“Just last week, an Adelaide court heard how a mum-of-two in this state feared for her life when her ex husband, a former SANFL player, threatened to set her on fire while splashing litres of petrol and flicking a lighter.

“Violence against women can’t ever be allowed. But let’s not get hysterical over a group of school kids and their chatter in a sports locker room.”

The argument certainly hit a nerve as 90 per cent of 2858 voters in our online poll agreed that young men and boys were now being unfairly tarred with a toxic brush.

And the comments section had a similar theme

TELL US WHY IN THE COMMENTS

What you said

Paul

Throughout schooling my two boys had been made to feel bad about their gender.

Boys and young men do need our love and support.

By the way, if you treat people as second-class citizens or pariahs, they then act like pariahs.

Fred

When quoters are set by companies, it’s no longer the best person for the job and this is hurting young men.

David

Males are treated as second class citizens nowadays.

Rodney

One or two bad apples will always get more attention than fifty good ones.

Error404

Young men are constantly criticized within the education system. Nothing they do is ever good enough and young women are pushed forward always for more ‘opportunities’, as if they are lacking nowadays.

The system is unfairly geared against males. It’s not an assumption or an opinion. Since the introduction of ‘New SACE’ and the march towards portfolios, PBL and group work, boys are drowning in all aspects of education, while girls are thriving. The statistics are there and have been now for 30 years.

To then go on and kick them when they are attempting to perform against a society that screams that their very existence is a blight, well, we should be ashamed.

Andrew

Having brought up three girls and three boys I can say that that it is not a one way street.. my daughters can be just as nasty as my sons and are more then capable of giving ‘put downs’. Respect, kindness and decency is required by all genders.

A bit nervous

It’s easy to pick on the most tolerant group of people that have ever existed. Try demonise any other cohort the same way. Bet it won’t pan out the same way.

Brenda

Our young men and boys need our love and support and understanding as well as strong leadership. it’s hard work but the outcome of seeing a young man who is respectful, compassionate and loyal is worth it.

Stephen

Violence against women can never be allowed. True, but unless you place it into context it is dangerously misleading. Surely the more important thing is to emphasise that violence is never acceptable against men or women. There are many many female perpetrators of domestic violence, but those stories are largely ignored or glossed over by the media. Many of the victims of such violence are themselves females, but once again that is often glossed over. Balance needs to be restored to the whole debate in order to put it into proper perspective.

Paul

I taught in public schools for 40 years. For three of those years I had an all boys year 6/7 class. It was lots of fun. Respect and cooperation, striving for success and supporting each other were the main drivers in our room. Boys respond well to clear boundaries and strong moral bonds. Success was shared. The lads responded really positively with improved academic results and an awareness of boys capacity for love within their cohort.

Pembroke School footballers were caught up in a scandal last week. Picture: Roy VanDerVegt

Wayne

When I was still teaching (retired now) there was a big focus on boys. Steve Biddulph’s books and tapes on raising boys were very popular and useful. His books are still around and there are other resources available too. Good parenting is vital as are healthy relationships between parents. I am proud of our son who is a great husband and father, shaped by us and his schooling. Society needs standards and boys need to be taught and loved well. Media can help with positive stories as well as factual reports. Everyone getting physically active and off social media will also help. wife and mother

READ REBECCA’S COLUMN AND THE OTHER COMMENTS HERE

Claire

Thank you, yes there are some men doing really bad things but the pile on on men has been getting bigger for years. I’ve coached boys for many years and I find most of them to be really thoughtful and caring kids, they like to play hard but also will stop and help mid game if an opponent is accidentally hurt. Not coincidentally they all have decent parents who are trying their best to raise them to be respectful. Boys will always be boys and sometimes say or do stupid things but didn’t we all?

Cameron

There is now a massive imbalance in rights. Sportsmen have to tolerate female reporters in their dressing rooms, but the reverse is rightly disallowed. How about some respect for the boys?

Struggle town

The amount of time I hear women at my work objectify men who come into the office is crazy. And I am looked at strangely when I ask what if I was to say similar things if it were an attractive woman. The response is one of confusion, because they just don’t get the hypocrisy.

Anthony

I am tired of boys and men been tarred with the same brush. What has happened to some of those beautiful souls is sickening and we should focus our energy on protecting those at risk. Not piling on males generically based on action of the minority.

Giracatrova

Generally speaking, we are a product of our very complex societies in which we live work and play. Trying to make sense of anything now, is so complicated and convoluted that we lose sight of what is real and what is fake. Getting “back to basics” will allow us to appreciate the world around us. Your article is so simple in its delivery and the message it sends out, that it allowed me to stop and appreciate the small things that people do each and every day.