Off the record: SA’s home of political, business and legal gossip

THE powerbrokers’ favourite coffee haunt is up for sale and we were right about Don Farrell. This and more in Off the Record, our weekly political, legal and business gossip column.

Joe's Kiosk owner Joe Weber with Tony Abbott.

THIS WEEK: The powerbrokers’ favourite coffee haunt is up for sale, we were right about Don Farrell, and the NSW Premier bows to SA superiority.

Joe's Kiosk owner Joe Weber.

IT’S news that will send a shudder through Adelaide’s powerbrokers and strike at the heart of their seaside weekend retreat – Joe’s Kiosk is up for sale.

The Henley Beach weekend coffee institution is frequented by more politicians than any other place in Australia, except Canberra’s Parliament House.

But the nondescript Esplanade kiosk, run by Joe Weber for the past 20 years, also is a favourite of business leaders and sports stars, including past and present Port Adelaide and Adelaide United players.

A snapshot of the names include Tony Abbott, Joe Hockey, Bill Shorten, Tony Burke, Kim Beazley, Nick Bolkus, Simon Crean, Laurie Brereton, John Rau, Patrick Conlon, Alexander Downer, Don Farrell, lobbyist Ian Smith, Natasha Stott Despoja, Chief Justice Chris Kourakis, former AFL chief Wayne Jackson, Neil Kerley, Port’s Warren Tredrea, artist Andrew Baines, John Kosmina, Shaun Rehn, former Swan Barry Hall and, drum roll, Hollywood superstars Geoffrey Rush and Mel Gibson (more about him later).

But as 64-year-old Weber fields offers for the kiosk’s 18-year lease, Off the Record poses the obvious question – where will everyone go for coffee when Joe is gone?

Perhaps Weber’s regulars can follow him to Melbourne, where he intends to spend a year or two helping his sister set up a tapas bar on Carlton’s popular Lygon St. Or they can wait until he returns to revamp Lunch on Richmond, on Richmond Rd, Keswick.

Weber says the secret to his kiosk’s success has been a relaxed, family-friendly, community-minded vibe, enhanced by the spectacular beachfront location.

“I don’t change it. It’s a kiosk, not a cafe. I’ve made a lot of friends in this kiosk. It’s like a big village here but without the noise,” he said.

People with high-pressure lifestyles are attracted for weekend coffee by the sea’s serenity, he says, helping them relax.

Ever the professional, Joe won’t let out too many secrets about his high-profile regulars. But he does laugh at the time Gibson popped in, about 15 years ago.

“He had a house across the road that he used to rent out to his sister-in-law,” Joe recalled.

“He came in with sunglasses and a cap. I said: ‘Hey, Mel’ and he said: ‘Don’t say anything’. He didn’t want to be recognised.”

Joe’s lease is already as prized as his coffee. Within a day of placing a six-word advertisement in The Advertiser’s SA Business Journal this week, he had 40 expressions of interest.

Perhaps one of the powerbrokers who haunt the kiosk can take over the lease to keep the special vibe going.

BASH AND CRASH

URSED, clumsy or just unlucky? Wayne Jackson had another nasty fall last week. The former AFL chief, who broke eight ribs in 2001 after tumbling from a tractor on his South-East property, came to grief while riding with some mates on the Torrens Linear Park.

Jackson (below) admits he may have been going a little fast and came a cropper near the Festival Theatre. He knocked himself unconscious, needed 11 stitches, put some teeth through lips and split his helmet.

On the bright side: “It was pretty easy for the ambulance to get there.”

Jackson has been recuperating at the farm but has not been on his bike since. But he has some advice for more senior cyclists.

“You have to be a bit more careful when you get older.”

GODFATHER PART III

EXHIBIT A in why you should never trust a politician but always believe Off the ­Record. After weeks of obfuscation from Labor, confirmation came this week that ex-senator Don Farrell was going to become future senator Don Farrell, as was forecast on this very page on March 26 (below).

We wrote then that “while Labor’s No.1 slot on its Senate ticket will go to the high-profile Penny Wong, Farrell will slide in at No.2, followed by current senators Alex Gallacher and Anne McEwen at three and four”, which is exactly what happened.

Following his confirmation this week, Farrell told Off the Record he will be resigning from all his board positions, which include Adelaide Festival Centre, Super SA, the Philippines Chamber of Commerce and the recently controversial Camp Gallipoli.

Federal Veterans’ Affairs Minister Dan Tehan has launched an investigation into Camp Gallipoli, which until yesterday included ex-Liberal MPs Alan Ferguson and Graham Ingerson on its board. Farrell and Ingerson resigned at a board meeting yesterday, but both maintain confidence in the group’s activities. “There is an investigation and I don’t believe it will discover anything,’’ Farrell said, hopefully.

GOLDEN GIRL

A GOLDEN touch is being applied to the wounded image of Adelaide Liberal candidate David Colovic, who stumbled spectacularly by describing part of the electorate as “the poor end of town”.

Former Adelaide MP Trish Worth, recently returned from New South Wales, is helping direct strategy for Colovic’s campaign. It lines up Worth against the woman who deposed her, Labor’s Kate Ellis.

Worth was among three SA Liberal women whom John Howard famously branded “Golden Girls” for their ability to keep winning marginal seats through relentless campaigning.

TIGER IN THE PORT

FOLLOWING in the footsteps of Chad Cornes and Kane Cornes, the son of another Glenelg legend is about to do battle for Port Adelaide.

This time it’s Matthew Carey, the son of Peter “Super” Carey, who played an Australian-record 448 games for the Tigers and captained their 1985 and 1986 premiership teams.

Matthew is standing for the Greens in the seat of Port Adelaide, safely held by Labor’s Mark Butler.

WINES THAT BIND

IT’S apt that a French firm should be chosen to build Australia’s $50 billion future submarines in the nation’s wine state.

And a cartoon Off the Record has discovered in the tragically infamous French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo emphasises the close vinous relationship.

“How do you recognise French submarines?” asks the caption of the cartoon (below).

“They are the only ones that double as corkscrews.”

A Barracuda is a popular type of corkscrew and the French have dubbed their future Australian submarine the Shortfin Barracuda Block 1A. How wonderfully apt.

LUCKY BREAK

IN another French letter, staff at Adelaide’s Defence Teaming Centre staff had an extra reason to be relieved when DCNS was announced as the winner of the future submarine contract.

The industry body held its annual black-tie dinner and awards ceremony last night at the Adelaide Entertainment Centre – sponsored by DCNS.

Embarrassment avoided, so last night’s toasts were “bonne chance” rather than “merde”.

KEEP THE RED FLAG FLYING

IT HAS taken almost a fortnight but the flag of A-League grand final winners Adelaide United is finally ­flying atop the New South Wales Parliament (left).

NSW Premier Mike Baird yesterday honoured the bet he made with South Australian Premier Jay Weatherill before the Adelaide United v Western Sydney Wanderers grand final at Adelaide Oval on May 1.

Off The Record revealed last week the flag had not yet arrived  and  Baird’s  office was urging Weatherill to pop one in the post. In return, Weatherill declared a “giant custom  flag”  was  on  the way.

After running up the flag at his Macquarie St stronghold yesterday, Baird said: “It didn’t fly with pride but it did fly. Go Wanderers in 2017.”

Adelaide United won their first A-League grand final 3-1 in front of 50,119 fans.

Former SA arts administrator Barbara Allen.

WHERE ARE THEY NOW?

BACK when Barbara Allen was director of the Adelaide Fringe from 1995-2000, the event was only held every two years, ran for three weeks and grew from 339 to 536 acts.

Skip forward two decades and the Fringe has not only gone annual and runs for a month but regularly features more than 1000 shows.

If you don’t remember her name, that might be because, by her second Fringe, Barbara Allen (above) had become Barbara Wolke after marrying American music producer Michael Wolke. She now uses the name Allen again.

For the past 13 years, Allen has been the major events and film officer for Tweed Shire Council in northern NSW. But she has changed tack somewhat, pushing the Tweed’s efforts to “ride the sports tourism wave” to initiate national ­triathlon and cycling events.