Matthew Abraham: Nick Xenophon is so private he makes Howard Hughes look like an extrovert

NICK Xenophon is an enigmatic character. Matthew Abraham has known him for 20 years and hardly knows him at all.

Nick Xenophon is an enigmatic character. Matthew Abraham has known him for 20 years and hardly knows him at all.

IF you ever get the chance to have a meal with Nick Xenophon, order a pastie. You might as well, because the odds are you will end up with indigestion anyway.

Eating and leisurely are not two words that sit easily with the soon-to-be former Senator, likely new MP for Hartley, failed shepherd, and just possibly SA’s next Premier.

It’s why he pops the anti-reflux pills Zantac like gummy bears.

Wisely, I went for the pastie option when we met for lunch at the world-renowned St Peters Bakehouse a while back. All the tables were taken at the Seventh Ave eatery so we walked across the road with our plates, cutlery, pasties and sauce, and ate lunch in his Toyota Yaris, balancing the plates on our knees.

Xenophon has always been the master chef of political indigestion.

But in the nine days since revealing he will quit the Senate to contest the state Liberal-held marginal seat of Hartley, SA’s political system has not just had an upset tummy. It has been throwing up.

Xenophon declares he is making the switch because that same system is ‘‘broken and politically bankrupt’’. Pitch-perfect Xenophon-speak.

We are witnessing quite an experiment as the Labor and Liberal camps adopt contrary tactics to try to quarantine the Xenophon threat.

A Labor insider told me during the week the party’s leadership ‘‘have to restrain themselves from dancing on the table’’ at Xenophon’s entry. We shall see. He may dance on their graves.

Premier Jay Weatherill, breezily leaving the door ajar to a post-election deal, portrays Xenophon’s support as a no confidence vote in Liberal leader, Steven Marshall.

Duringthe week, this paper’s Galaxy poll in Hartley showed Xenophon with a big 34 per cent primary vote and poised to win on preferences.

'Nick's Vision' from Light's Vision. Nick Xenophon announces he is quitting Federal Parliament and will run in the South Australian state election next year. He will be running for the seat of Hartley in Adelaide's east. Pi

Treasurer Tom Koutsantonis hopped on Twitter to declare: ‘‘The first of many @LiberalSAHQ seats to potentially fall to Xenophon as Liberal voters abandon Steven Marshall. #LibSplit’’.

But wait a minute. The Galaxy poll showed sitting Liberal MP Vincent Tarzia’s primary vote dented but still healthy on 38 per cent – no surprise for an MP who tirelessly massages the electorate’s Italian heartland, where 18 per cent of voters are solely of Italian origin, almost 12 per cent of households speak fluent Italian and 48 per cent of the electorate have both parents born overseas.

He attends all the religious festas, and not just as an observer. As a battenti, or card-carrying devotee, of Saint Pellegrino, he crawled to the altar on his knees and elbows after a kilometre-long procession venerating the Italian saint. That’s door-knocking, Hartley style.

And what of the ALP vote in Hartley? Galaxy puts it at an embarrassing 17 per cent.

The party has not bothered recruiting a candidate. So, does this mean voters are abandoning Jay Weatherill or has he abandoned them?

If the ALP strategy is two-faced, the Liberal plan is high risk because the party has much more to lose from the Xenophon blitzkrieg.

It may also be monumentally stupid.

Marshall is warning voters that a vote for Xenophon is a vote for political chaos.

He has delivered the same message personally to Xenophon in private meetings, urging him, for the good of SA, not to run. That worked. Not.

Chaos is exactly what the Xenophon supporter craves. They have lost faith in the major parties and want to wreck the joint.

Or, as one Labor MP put it, ‘‘they want to see an atomic bomb explode over North Tce’’.

The ABC’s election analyst Antony Green thinks there is a slim chance Xenophon could be Premier after the March election.

This week, the Seven News Reachtel poll found Xenophon only lineball to win Hartley but an amazing 43 per cent wanted him as Premier.

One influential Liberal backer said he was not surprised, adding ‘‘I’d put a thousand bucks on Nick being Premier’’, in a Liberal coalition government.

If that happens, SA will have elected a leader they only think they know.

Nick Xenophon is one of the nation’s highest profile politicians and yet is so private he makes the late Hollywood recluse Howard Hughes look like an extrovert.

He says he has lived in Hartley for decades. Where? Has anyone ever seen his house? Is it a cream brick flat or a mansion? Has anyone ever seen inside? Is it littered with pizza boxes or priceless antiques?

Don’t ask me. I have known Nick very well for 20 years and hardly know him at all.