Bec Baker: Don’t turn workplace flexibility into parent versus non-parent war – we’ve worked too hard for it

Those who embrace workplace flexibility shouldn’t be confused with slack-arse co-workers – nor should it be an excuse to shame working parents, writes Bec Baker.

“Not everything is as it seems, and not everything that seems is,” famously noted the late Portuguese writer Jose Saramago.

And so it is with flexible work arrangements; just because you can’t see someone diligently working at their desk, doesn’t mean they are not hard at work or any less committed than their colleague, in full view of the boss.

According to a recent study by demographic research firm McCrindle, the future of work is likely to be hybrid, with three in five Australians (61 per cent) looking for a degree of flexibility in their working arrangements.

Most want a mix of working from home and in the office or workplace – so let’s embrace it, not fuel division as a war between parent versus non-parent employee.

As a single, working parent with family living interstate, I’m incredibly grateful for the option to work off-site, under the proviso that I meet set deadlines.

It makes getting kids to after-school sports trainings doable, even if it pushes out my work day as my “office” shifts from the newsroom, to a sportsground carpark, to home.

I’ve spent countless hours working in my car, making phone calls, conducting interviews, writing up notes and filing stories as kids train nearby.

More often than not, I’ll pick it up again when we are home, logging on at the kitchen table after the kids are fed, homework checked and muddy sports clothes put through the wash.

Typically, I’ll set the alarm early to log on ahead of the before-work morning ritual of kids’ breakfasts, ironing uniforms, making lunches, putting on a load or two of washing and perhaps even preparing a quick spaghetti bolognese for the evening meal – all by 8am.

Far from being a heroic mum or worker, it’s simply the realistic flip side of having the flexibility to work off-site, as is frequently working to 10pm or 11pm on a Friday night, my main deadline eve, while most others relax and socialise.

Still, I harbour self-doubt and guilt that I am not working hard enough, not helped by the sanctimonious tut-tutting of some young whippersnappers.

This week The Advertiser colleague Emily Olle, a self-professed “childless, wide-eyed” young worker, shared her concerns that she and others like her “without little gremlins by our sides bear the brunt of the workload lifted off the shoulders of kid-burdened colleagues”.

“ … we also have medical appointments, friends, social lives and hobbies that are no less important than running little Timmy to soccer practice twice a week,” she writes, adding brunch is high on the agenda of her and other like-minded “fun, single, hardworking” buddies, dumped she says with the crappy shifts as they “strive to impress”.

Working parents aren’t heading off for lattes or a glass of bubbles during office hours.

Well bully to you … I will give you the big tip, when I am scooting out of the office, I am not off to sip lattes or chug down a glass of bubbles.

I’m the frazzled individual with bags under my eyes and 18-months of hair regrowth frantic to get through as much work as possible, to avoid having to do so much after hours. Who doesn’t take lunch breaks or coffee with friends.

Climbing the corporate ladder isn’t high on my agenda, which is a good thing given I’ve spent the best part of the past decade moving sideways rather than skywards, drawn to family-friendly roles that offer flexibility over glamour, excitement and travel.

But that’s OK as for me, flexibility is much more valuable. For, you see, while I need to work for financial reasons, my kids are unashamedly my priority and I’m acutely aware this phase of parenthood, something I will never get back, will too soon be gone.

I wholeheartedly agree those without kids shouldn’t be expected to take up the slack of those with kids but work-shy individuals come in all forms – those with kids and those without.

Don’t confuse slack-arse co-workers with workplace flexibility which is a privilege – many have fought hard for – and should be treated as such. So too is being a parent.