Barrett, you’ll have to pry the Showdown from my cold, Adelaidean hands | Michael Mkoka-Nicholson

Bloated Melbourne clubs have been propped up by fanatical SA and WA fans for years. They don’t need any more of our things, writes Michael Mkoka-Nicholson.

After basking in the glory of Showdown 53 for days now, while also eyeing off flights to Melbourne in September (the lid is off), I couldn’t help but notice the media out east turning its attention to our blockbuster footy event instead of continuing its breathless coverage of the Daicos brothers.

My ears suddenly pricked up when the AFL’s online show “Access All Areas” even uttered the word Showdown – such is the shock of being a Crows, Port or non-Vic supporter following Aussie rules.

“Damo, should the Showdown be given the marquee timeslot on Friday night football every year?” asked SANFL/VFL/AFL legend Matthew Lloyd.

“Oh, absolutely,” replied some guy called Damian Barrett.

The Showdown, Darcy Parish and the Lions are all on the Access All Areas agenda.

Watch the latest episode: https://t.co/DcNZvKtwCApic.twitter.com/kJQTV7ajqj

— AFL (@AFL) April 4, 2023

I could hardly believe it. Me, a noted South Australian nuffy, agreeing with Victorians …. talking about footy??? I gasped.

But Barrett didn’t stop there.

“I’ve been saying this for a couple of years, and I know it’s a minority view, but I feel like we should bring it to Melbourne,” he continued, as I choked on my fritz and sauce sanga.

“Not just to make it a top Friday night timeslot, but bring it to Melbourne – the MCG.”

Sorry Damian, you can pry the Showdown from the clutches of my cold, fritz and sauce-covered hands. Picture: Supplied

And with that, I spat my Farmer’s Union Iced Coffee all over my computer screen as I tried to piece together what nonsense was dribbling out of his mouth.

Nat Edwards, the one person speaking any sense, exclaimed over the mind boggling buffoonery, “What? No! Adelaide Oval is amazing, the atmosphere there, to watch a Showdown. You’re going to upset a lot of South Australians.”

Upset? UPSET? Upset is when your local supermarket runs out of FruChocs. This made my blood boil.

It is ONE thing to come for, and relieve us of, the immense debt of hosting the Formula 1 Grand Prix, but it is another to come for the jewel in the crown of our sporting calendar.

It's time the AFL recognised the best rivalry in the league – and the real home of AFL.

I’m sure if the VFL – I mean AFL – had its way, Gather Round would be permanently moved to Victoria, every round, every year. Such is its disparity between reality and what the rest of the competition wants, needs, and feels is fair.

It’s bad enough that the last day in September proudly goes to the “home of football” at the MCG, despite who may have finished top and earned the right to a home ground advantage. (Am I still smarting over 2017? Who’s to say?)

All I have to say to you, Mr Barrett, is: have your decade’s long deal with the MCC and MCG. Have your bloated number of Melbourne sides who need propping up by fanatical WA/SA supporters. Hell, we’ll even let Coopers out of the state for you to enjoy while watching the footy.

But Victorians will have to pry the Showdown out of my cold dead hands before it leaves the hallowed turf and true home of Aussie rules – Adelaide Oval.

Michael Mkoka-Nicholson is The Advertiser’s Audience Development Editor and a long suffering Crows supporter. Do you agree with him? Leave a comment below.