A Northern Rivers woman who is one of Byron Bay’s most well-known “sex shamans” says the nature of her work has the “profound ability to heal”.
From “healing” victims of rape and sexual abuse to helping men work through a whole spectrum of dark and twisted fantasies, Sage (real name withheld), acknowledges she is a sex worker, but said her work goes far beyond simple pleasures.
Some of her clients find it thrilling to be “kicked fiercely in the balls”.
Others are young men discovering their sexuality and willing to explore it in a “safe and integrative way”.
However, she said her client base was predominantly older men in their 50s and 60s.
Despite the apparent variety in her work, Sage said “nine times out of ten my clients walk out of my sessions floating on an absolute cloud”.
But there are some lines Sage will not cross.
“Setting boundaries and knowing personal limits is an important part of the work,” she said.
When it comes to sex, Sage wants to shatter a common myth that sex workers are perverted or carry nympho-like tendencies.
Sage and her 36 year-old partner are “solid” and make love a “normal amount” – once or twice per week.
“We built a relationship with a foundation of commitment, communication, vulnerability and courage – and the integrity to want to grow together,” she said.
After a stint in retail in her early teens, Melbourne-born Sage got her start in sex work at the age of 18, topless waitressing “at private events in remote bushland in the middle of nowhere”.
Her parents have always been “open-minded and accepting”.
“They have always said to me as long as you are safe that is all that matters,” she said.
Her job has taken her around the world with Berlin, Amsterdam and Tokyo just a few of the places she has forged a career in the controversial realm of sex work.
Sage said her work “allows people to access all parts of themselves, be it light or dark and her sessions have “the profound ability to heal”.
“We can examine hidden fantasies from childhood and bring them into a level of acceptance so people can be more radiant in their life,” she said.
“My body of work includes platonic intimacy all the way through to erotic intimacy to conscious kink and shamanic archetypal work which takes people on journeys.”
When it comes to healing, Sage said the potential was “massive if people are willing to go there”.
“It can often take a lot of patience on my part, a lot of time,” she said.
“Often the first sessions are just getting someone to open up. The older people are the more they carry around sexually. But it’s really just emotion blocking their true sexuality and life force.”
When asked if she gets time wasters who want a quick release without the sprinkling of shaman, Sage said her sessions offer much more than just a physical release.
“It’s transforming the ways in which we ‘normally’ play out sexuality, having an agenda gets thrown out the window. It’s a spiritual erotic journey,” she said.
“I write a lot in my advertisements to help people understand they are coming for more than just a standard sex worker experience.
“Most of my clients are repeat clients. This also deters a lot of Tom, Dick and Harrys.
“This work is best served to men and women who are willing to take the journey, to explore something deeper, something different and something courageous.”
She has helped both male and female victims of rape or sexual abuse on multiple occasions.
“What I aim to do is try and give them some of their power back, so these negative patterns cease to continue playing out in their lives,” she said.
On the darker aspects of her work, Sage said “I think there’s a deep part of all of us that wants to inflict pain on someone”.
She’s referring to torture, a request she receives “on a regular basis”.
“If I have a man ask me to kick him in the testicles as hard as possible, and it’s something they genuinely enjoy, there’s a healing element there for me too,” she said.
“Because there’s some men out there that I would love to kick in the d**k, but would I actually do that in public? No! So this kind of session allows me to channel it in a safe and consenting environment.
“With the more intense sessions where darker fantasies are the main focus, there is a consent contract written, an after-care process and follow-up calls with the client.”
Sage has never felt unsafe in her job but wants other sex workers to know that one of the best things you can do is ensure clients send a copy of their drivers license before a session.
“Most importantly, know your boundaries and stick to them no matter what,” she said.
And she isn’t the only one doing this kind of work in the area.
“I know as many as 50-60 people doing similar work, and I have trained many men and women in the area,” she said.
“It’s great there’s a large community here and a number of retreats. It’s all about bringing people sexual liberation.”
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