Victim-survivor Josh Byrnes joins Your Reference Ain’t Relevant ACT campaign
When a local priest took a special interest in Josh Byrnes, he and his family “didn’t realise” the situation’s sinister reality.
Lifestyle
Don't miss out on the headlines from Lifestyle. Followed categories will be added to My News.
When the Catholic priest who groomed – and then sexually abused – Josh Byrnes was taken to court, he was not allowed to call on character references to minimise his sentence.
For Josh, though, it’s not hard to understand how devastating an impact such testimonies could have.
“I had a lifetime of people telling me this man was amazing, and that he was kind,” he tells news.com.au of the second cousin who abused him for eight years – beginning in 1999, when he was 11, until 2007, when he was 19.
In 2016, Josh went to the police. On the first day of his trial, Father Dennis Byrnes pleaded guilty to two counts of aggravated sexual assault of a person under 16, and was sentenced to six-and-a-half years in prison. Last November, after three-and-a-half years behind bars, he was released on parole.
“If it wasn’t for the fact that he was a parish priest, there very much is a chance he would’ve been able to use [character references] to potentially minimise his sentence,” Josh says.
“I don’t think that’s right. I don’t think there should be absolutely any leniency whatsoever for this crime. Sexual abuse is the worst of the worst.”
You can sign the Your Reference Ain’t Relevant petition here
It’s for this reason that he has thrown his support behind Your Reference Ain’t Relevant.
The campaign, co-founded by survivor-advocates Harrison James and Jarad Grice, aims to eradicate legislation that allows convicted paedophiles to invoke good character references as a potential means of lessening their sentences.
After launching in NSW in May (law reform is expected early next year), last month the pair turned their focus to the ACT, where they are urging the government to amend section 34A(b) of the Crimes (Sentencing) Act 2005.
While people with so-called ‘good standing’ in the community – teachers, religious leaders, scout masters, and doctors – cannot rely on a good character reference, family friends and relatives of the victim are legally within their right to do so.
In a petition lodged to the ACT Legislative Assembly, Harrison and Mr Grice have called for the final 15 words of the current legislation to be removed – to ensure all those convicted of child sexual abuse are held to account.
In Australia, “there’s a lot more protection in place for the people who abuse, as opposed to the victim-survivors”, Josh says.
“That needs to change. Child sex abuse is, I think, almost a crime unto itself,” he says.
“It involves not just the act; it involves grooming, it involves creating these almost separate personas, these ‘good characters’ to place themselves in positions where they’re able to do all of that, and pull the wool over other’s eyes.”
When Josh’s parents separated, Father Byrnes “took on this sort of self-appointed mentor role”.
“Every Sunday we would go to church, and after church, I’d help mow the lawns. And then afterwards, he would say, ‘You can go upstairs and have a shower’,” Josh recalls.
“And then when I started having a shower, he would come into the room, or he would say, ‘Show me how you wash yourself, show me how you clean yourself. I’m here to educate you. I’m here to be a mentor. If you have any hang-ups about what’s going on physically with yourself, if you have any hang-ups about your sexuality or anything, please come and talk to me.’”
At no point, Josh says, was he aware of the true nature of Father Byrnes’s behaviour.
“I’m not ashamed to say, there’s a certain part of me that thought when I was going through this that I loved him,” he says.
“I felt that he was somebody who was providing for me; who’d stepped in when my parents were absent. I believed him when he said he was educating me. I believed him when he said, ‘I really care for you, and this is how we’re doing these things’.”
When he met his now-wife Kelsey, however, “she started asking questions about the relationship”.
“Kels said to me one day, ‘You know this whole thing with you and Father Byrnes – did anything ever happen?’ And I said, ‘No, what do you mean?’” Josh says.
“She said, ‘Did anything ever happen in terms of sexual abuse – do you feel like he abused you?’
“And I said, ‘Oh, no, no, no, it wasn’t like that’. We were on the mid-north coast [at the time] and going to the beach for the day. And it wasn’t until we got home that I sat down outside and it really clicked in my head. And I said, ‘Kels, do you know what? Yeah, it happened.’”
The realisation “was earth-shattering, in a lot of ways”, Josh says.
“It was an out-of-body experience … It wasn’t until I’d done a lot of healing in my journey, and a lot of research about [abuse] it clicked – that it took quite a lot for this man to groom me,” he says.
“I didn’t realise I was being groomed. And when I talk to my family, they’re the same.
“Everybody made us believe he was this really awesome, amazing man who’d taken this interest in me and provided for me … At the core of it, it was so selfish and evil what he was doing to me over that time.”
During proceedings, evidence emerged that Father Byrnes had offended previously, in 1984 – some 15 years before he began to abuse Josh – and that the Diocese of Lismore “did what the church did – which is nothing”.
“Yes I was angry at him, but it became directed more at that multi-level, institutional, systematic failure – I call it the systematic failing machine, because that’s what it is, as a church,” Josh says.
“Not only had he done me wrong, but there were so many people at the church who had done me wrong. It was really disappointing and disheartening. I was angry that I’d become one of those statistics when you read about the Catholic Church and the cover-up.”
What’s more, “Kelsey was having a conversation with someone and they said to her, ‘Oh, yes, there’s a bit of hearsay and rumours about [Father Byrnes], but I don’t want to talk out of school’”, Josh says.
“And that right there is the issue. There’s too much pressure on survivors and victims to maintain their silence just so others can stay comfortable. We talk about the statistics – one in three girls and one in five boys in Australia [have been sexually abused] – and yet the conviction rate is so low – 0.3 per cent.
“We need to open up and have these conversations about what it’s like for victim-survivors to go through this process, because it is so traumatising.”
The Your Reference Ain’t Relevant ACT petition, sponsored by Greens MLA Andrew Braddock, closes at the end of January. It has already surpassed the 500 signatures needed to be referred to a committee, and received the endorsement of the Australian Federal Police Association, Domestic Violence Crisis Centre, Canberra Rape Crisis Centre, and ACT Human Rights Commission, among others. ACT Attorney-General Shane Rattenbury also previously confirmed he intends to pursue legal reform in this area.
Remarking on the “incredible progress” Your Reference Ain’t Relevant has made in the nation’s capital, Harrison says the campaign is “beyond privileged” to have Josh on board.
“We firmly believe in the power of survivor voices – it’s a cornerstone of our campaign. We feel honoured to have his generosity and resilience as part of the team,” Harrison tells news.com.au.
“It’s stories like Josh’s that are the heartbeat of this campaign. They remind us of the critical importance of the changes we’re advocating for, [and] provide a human element that allows people to connect with the work we’re doing – which is why the campaign has been so successful up to this point.”
Josh encourages everyone to “get behind [the petition] and help make the change – because [victim-survivors] are not going to stop”.
“We’ve had our voices heard, and we just want to keep talking and, really, not so much speak for, but be the voices for the people who haven’t found their voices yet.”
You can sign the Your Reference Ain’t Relevant petition here
Originally published as Victim-survivor Josh Byrnes joins Your Reference Ain’t Relevant ACT campaign
‘Excited’: Coles launches $400m Aussie first
The supermarket giant has unveiled an Australian first that will change the nature of online grocery shopping forever.
Nation asks millions to have ‘sex at work’
Alarmist politicians around the globe have started getting creative when it comes to birthrates, but this quirky suggestion might just take the cake.