Experts reveal shocking reason Aussie couples will break up today
Experts have shared the surprising reason many Aussie couples will find their relationships come to a dramatic end in the next 24 hours.
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December 11 has been unofficially dubbed ‘Breakup Day’ after studies revealed it to be the most common date for relationships to end.
Originally identified in 2008 through Facebook data analysed by Information Is Beautiful, the trend has endured, even as fewer people update their relationship status on social media.
But why do so many couples call it quits just weeks before Christmas?
Experts say the timing is no coincidence.
Clinical psychologist Rachel Harker, founder of the psychology-based dating and friendship app Tribal, explains the underlying reasons why this time of year sees a surge in breakups.
“December 11 is the most common day for breakups due to the timing before the holiday season,” she told news.com.au.
Ms Harker attributes this to three key factors.
Firstly, it’s a time when people are looking back on the year and are thinking about fresh starts.
“As people look ahead to the new year, they may evaluate their lives. Any doubts or concerns about their relationship will likely feel amplified right now, prompting decisions for a fresh start,” she explained.
Holiday stress also plays a big part.
“This time of year can place increased stress and pressure on relationships,” she noted. “Financial worries, family obligations, and the general chaos of the holiday season can even test stable relationships. If your relationship is already under strain, the increased stress during this period might be too much to survive.”
The desire for closure is a contributing factor, too.
“Many people may want to end things before going into the holiday season instead of carrying the burden throughout this period. Removing a stressor instead of carrying an emotional load is how many people cope.”
For couples teetering on the edge, deciding whether to end things before Christmas can be hard.
Ms Harker suggests weighing up several factors carefully, especially if children are involved.
“If there are children, I’d suggest having a private conversation about how to navigate this challenging period,” she advised. “While you might privately end things, you may stay together as a family until the new year.”
She also recommends consulting a professional about how to best discuss your new family dynamics with your children in an age-appropriate way.
For others, starting the conversation early is key.
“Have an open and honest communication channel,” Ms Harker advises. “Ask yourselves questions like: Why is the relationship coming to an end? What do both parties need? Is this truly the end, or are there things we can work on?”
She also warns against rushing a break-up just for the sake of closure.
“You likely won’t feel any closure if the above questions aren’t addressed,” she says.
For those determined to stick it out, Ms Harker shared some practical advice to manage the festive season’s challenges.
“Have regular check-ins and don’t keep things bottled up. Avoiding issues causes feelings to build under the surface, potentially leading to larger arguments,” she notes.
“Don’t play the blame game. Respect each other’s thoughts and feelings about this time of year. The holiday season, while joyous for some, can be triggering for others.
“Sit down together as early as possible and discuss the holiday period. Are there stressors you can foresee? Can you go over a budget together? Have a plan for dealing with family obligations.”
She also suggests couples make an effort to spend quality time together and plan a few special events as a couple.
“Low-cost options like a picnic, a day at the beach, or a cosy evening at home can go a long way.”
Chantelle Otten, Bumble’s resident sexologist, also points to reflection as a driver for breakups around December 11.
“We tend to use Christmas and the promise of a fresh start in the new year as a time to reflect, so it’s not surprising that there’s a spike in breakups around this time,” she says.
Otten encourages those considering a break-up not to force themselves to stay in an unhappy relationship for the sake of the holidays.
“Being single can be such a beautiful period of life,” she says. “If your relationship isn’t working for you, there’s no reason to suffer through the festive period for the sake of it.”
She notes that Australians are increasingly mindful about their dating choices.
“Bumble recently found that almost half of single Australians are more mindful and intentional about how, and when, they date. Australians aren’t settling for less than they deserve and are focused on having healthy and equal relationships that meet their needs and expectations.”
For those ready to get back into the dating game, Otten advises taking it slow and being clear about what you’re looking for.
Tinder’s Director of Communications, Kirsty Dunn, says that while the end of the year might be break-up season, the busiest day on Tinder, she reveals, is just weeks away.
“One of the busiest days of the dating app calendar year is the first Sunday of every year – coined Dating Sunday,” she says.
In 2025, that falls on January 5.
“Dating Sunday is a prime time for singletons to start their quest for love and connections, having spent the holidays self-reflecting and armed with their New Year’s resolutions and goals,” Ms Dunn says.
2024 saw the number of Likes increase by 18.2 per cent on this day and the number of DMs sent increase by 22 per cent.
From January 6 until Valentine’s Day, there were 11.4 million more messages sent globally compared with the rest of the year, and a stunning 58.7 million more likes sent compared to the rest of the year.
In fact, 519 bios were edited and 2263 photos were added to profiles every minute during this time.
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