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‘You will be making a gigantic mistake if this is what you name your baby’

Steph was horrified when she heard the name her brother chose for his baby, but is there a little more than meets the eye? 

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The countdown is on until Mark* and *Cassie's baby is born.

They knew they were going to have a boy and had started shortlisting potential names they were considering. Finally, after months of back and forth, they came to a conclusion

But when they shared it with their family, there were more. 

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Is this baby name a tribute to the couple's endless love for tea? Picture: iStock
Is this baby name a tribute to the couple's endless love for tea? Picture: iStock

“It just doesn’t make any f**king sense”

Cassie is due to give birth in a month, so they gathered the family around to share the name they’d decided for their child. 

“Earlgay,” Mark’s sister, Steph*, revealed on Reddit. “Yes. That is it. Earlgay.”

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She and the family were wracking their brains to think of a reason why the couple would select this name.

“I don’t think it’s a reference to anything,” she said. 

You may think they’re massive fans of Earl Grey tea, but that was quickly debunked. “I asked my brother, and he said they don’t drink tea,” Steph said. 

The questions didn’t stop there. 

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“Our younger sister asked our SIL if the name Earl was a family name on her side, and the answer is no,” she continued. 

Everyone was flummoxed. “It just doesn’t make any f**king sense,” she said. Then came the angry comments, first from Mark and Steph’s dad, who typically stays clear of family drama. 

“You are making a gigantic mistake if you go through with this,” he sternly warned Mark and Cassie. 

He wasn’t alone in this sentiment; Steph contemplated how many issues would likely emerge.

“If you like the name Earl, it’s a bit old-fashioned at this point, but whatever. Why add ‘-gay’ to it?” she asked. “Even beyond the low-hanging fruit that offers playground bullies, it literally doesn’t seem to have a point.”

It has left the entire family “stone-cold puzzled”, but the couple are holding firm. “Literally everybody in their orbit is against it,” Steph remarked. “The best explanation we can get from either one of them is: ‘It sounds good to us’.” 

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Mystery solved?

At first, people online were just as confused as Steph, trying to comprehend what could have caused Mark and Cassie to pick such an unusual name. 

“They’re idiots, and they’re signing up their son to a lifetime of bullying,” someone bluntly wrote. “It’s a horrible name on multiple levels,” another agreed. 

“When considering a child's name, you need to consider how the name can be used to make fun of the child by bullies because it will happen,” a third wrote. “Earlgay is unsurprisingly easy to see how this would be the case.”

Suddenly, a light bulb went off, and the Reddit community had cracked the code - it was Pig Latin. 

The baby’s name wasn’t “Earlgay”, but “Irlgay”, which in Pig Latin translates to “girl”. This means the couple, who originally thought they were having a boy, may have been secretly revealing they’re actually having a girl. 

“Earl gay is how you would say girl in Pig Latin. Is it possible a previous ultrasound got the sex wrong?” someone wondered. 

“This makes sense!” someone cheered. “Good call!” said another. “This would be a hilarious troll to let the family know it’s actually a girl,” wrote a third.

“I bet you they’re picking a name in-laws won’t like, so this prank is a joint effort to make that name sound like a relief,” another hypothesised.

“Your bro probably finally found a prank that has a practical use for SiL to go along with it.” 

Others suggested Mark and Cassie take things even further. “Meet our kids, Earlgay and Oybay. Here is our dog, Ogday,” a person joked. 

*Names have been changed

Originally published as ‘You will be making a gigantic mistake if this is what you name your baby’

Original URL: https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/you-will-be-making-a-gigantic-mistake-if-this-is-what-you-name-your-baby/news-story/08ac3b9baa1dedd9c5d07a9e154fabea