‘My husband mocked our daughter after she asked to stop play fighting’

“She was in tears, but he wouldn't apologise... he said she needed to be able to 'handle herself'," the mum says.

Pilar Grace

3 min read

June 3, 2024 - 9:12PM

Primary School

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When my husband was little, his dad used to tickle him until he couldn’t breathe.

It was the 80s, nobody talked about consent or taking people's non-verbal cues and his dad probably though they were having fun.

After all the interaction started out fun, and my husband was laughing.

But then it got to be too much, and because he was laughing so hard, he couldn’t tell his dad to stop.

Tickling morphed into something horrible, and to this day, he hates being tickled.

In games of playfighting, wrestling and tickling, things can go south very quickly.

And what started out as fun could end in someone getting hurt, or wanting the game to stop.

It’s an early, important lesson in consent, and one Sophie’s* husband Chris failed to teach their daughter.

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The little girl went to her room in tears. Photo: iStock

Dad mocks daughter after she wants to stop wrestling

Sophie described an upsetting incident in a Reddit post.

“My husband and daughter were rough-housing on the couch,” she explained.

“Pillow fights and tickle fights and wrestling are things they often do together.

“As I was watching them, my daughter fell to the ground and let out a big ‘Ow’, clearly showing that she hurt herself. My husband kept jabbing at her. She said, ‘Stop it, I’m hurt,’ and my husband mocked her.

“She got up, tears in her eyes and walked to her room.”

Sophie was upset. Their daughter given Chris a clear instruction about what she was and wasn’t ok with and he not only ignored it, he made fun of her for it.

“I told my husband he should check on her and apologise for his behaviour. He said, ‘She’s fine,’ and sat on the couch watching something on his phone.”

They had an argument about the incident and Chris told So

phie she was overreacting.

“He said she needs to be able to handle situations like this with other people and that we won’t always be there to comfort her.”

Sophie was extremely upset.

“As her parents I want to show her that we care about her wellbeing. Also I believe our actions show her what love should look like when she grows up and I don’t want her thinking it’s ok to be treated like that when she’s grown up.”

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Reddit supports mum

Followers of the popular forum flocked to the comments in support of Sophie.

“I have two boys and we like rough-housing, but there is one golden rule. As soon as any one of us says stop or enough, we stop immediately and step back,” one person said.

“Mocking her emotions will teach her he’s not safe to go to with her emotions and problems,” said another. “It will teach her that her feelings are not important to him.”

“My father would be largely neglectful, but when he did spend time with us, it was completely on his terms and made me feel like a loser or wimp afterwards,” a third person said. “I have no relationship with him now. This post was quite triggering to me.”

*Names have been changed