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My husband makes $1 million a year but won’t let me be a SAHM

"Why does he do all of that if it's not so your family can do what they want?"  

Husband on $1 million won't let wife be a SAHM

When a couple decide to have children, there's often a discussion about who will bring in the main income, and who will be the primary carer - or whether the roles will be shared.

That of course changes over time depending on more children, career changes, and the life in general.

But one mum this week has confessed to financial guru Dave Ramsey that while she wants to continue the arrangement of her being a stay-at-home-mum (SAHM) her husband is staunchly against it...

Despite him earning more than $1million a year.

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"He makes about $975 USD"

"I'm currently on maternity leave until February, I don't really feel like I want to go back to work," Mercedes begins in her phone call to Ramsey's popular podcast.

"I feel like I want to spend time raising our little one."

Ramsey says that's a "great goal" and asks if her husband makes enough money for the family.

"He makes about $975 (USD) a year," she says.

Ramsey is incredulous and doesn't understand what she's asking about.

"I think you could struggle through," he finally jokes.

The mum clarifies, "I think he has a worry that I'll never go back. His mum works three jobs."

Ramsey then delivers an epic explanation of the value of a SAHM, explaining that his wife raised three kids, did charitable work, and now is a fully committed grandmother of six.

"I call that an incredible career," he tells Mercedes.

"Why does [your husband] do all of that if it's not so your family can do what they want to do?"

He adds that if she wants to work outside of the home that is also valuable, and her choice.

"But this idea that somehow motherhood is somehow to be shamed or looked down upon is absolute BS.... It is a high dignity position. This is a high calling, it has value. Sit the baby in his lap and ask him what's more important than that."

Image: Dave Ramsey/Facebook
Image: Dave Ramsey/Facebook

RELATED: ‘My husband won’t let me work after I’ve had kids’

"Family first"

Ramsey was widely applauded in the comments for his "family first" and "pro choice" support of the young mum.

But others raised concerns, with one writing, "Sounds like that husband is very controlling and calls all the shots or really wants to. This definitely sounds like he has a problem with control and that can only be fixed by him not marriage counseling," one said.

And another added, "His mum working three jobs should be the reason he wants his wife to stay home. I definitely don't understand this call. Raising a happy healthy family is the best work ever."

Finally, this woman shared her own experience: "What a selfish and unfeeling husband. My ex-husband would never allow me to stay home either. Our son was sick all the time and I went to work many times crying from leaving him. I also wasn't there when he and my daughter got off the bus each day. You can't get that time back."

Originally published as My husband makes $1 million a year but won’t let me be a SAHM

Original URL: https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/my-husband-makes-more-than-1-million-but-he-wont-let-me-be-a-sahm/news-story/f194bdc8f2b6215000cb03eaca0325ea