‘Back then you just had to shut up and get on with things’: ex AFL great Matthew Richardson talks men’s mental health
From his devastation at the death by suicide of Danny Frawley to his personal battle with post injury blues, ex AFL great Matthew Richardson opens up on mental health – then and now.
Lifestyle
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He’s been dubbed “one of the greatest Tigers of them all” but former AFL star Matthew “Richo” Richardson tells he silently battled bouts of depression after early career setbacks.
In a candid interview with the Sunday Mail, the superstar full forward of the late 1990s and early 2000s, says “back then you just had to shut up and get on with things”.
He reveals his anguish after the death by suicide of key mentors, his struggle to stay mentally strong in the face of season-ending injuries and his passion to now help men of all ages “talk when they’re feeling down”.
“(Mental health) just wasn’t really a thing that you even discussed; you just sort of suffered in silence, particularly men in the world I was in … sporting clubs and that sort of macho, alpha male-type environment,” Richardson said.
“You just had to shut up and get on with things. That was sort of the attitude but clearly, that doesn’t work.
“I can remember, just off the top of my head, at least half a dozen to a dozen examples of people who struggled … drinking too much and spiralling into a pretty bad place when they were injured or their career ended.”
He recalls, too, the shock and heartache of losing mentors to suicide.
“At Richmond, we lost a member of staff who everyone was pretty close to … on the surface he seemed to have it all and he took his own life. It’s heartbreaking,” he said
But it was the death of his former coach, Danny Frawley, almost two decades later that hit hardest.
“I remember getting the phone call when Danny passed away and it just like hit you in the guts, you know, you couldn’t believe it,” the 49-year-old says.
“He was my coach (2000 to 2004) and a guy that everyone loved in the footy industry; he was larger than life, he had a huge personality, everyone loved Danny.
“Whenever you were around Danny, you were laughing and smiling and he made you feel good … obviously, there were a lot of those days where Danny probably wasn’t feeling good – he was one that had actually been open about (his mental health struggles) – but he was still making other people smile and laugh.”
The sporting and media personality says “in retrospect” he recognises his struggle as a young player.
“I look back at times … you know, I suffered some career-threatening injuries; I had a knee reconstruction when I was 20 and then I had a foot reconstruction,” he said.
“Both of these injuries sort of ended my season early … I was pretty, pretty down for a fair while after that … when you’re lying around, you can’t move, you can’t exercise … I’ve no doubt I was a little bit depressed.”
He says for him daily exercise was – and remains – key.
Richardson says the football fraternity has evolved in its approach to mental health.
“Obviously now we see players having time off not because they’ve strained their hamstring but to get themselves feeling better (mentally) … they actually say ‘it’s a mental health break’,” he said.
“Christian Petracca, and what he went through (following a season-ending lacerated spleen, broken ribs and punctured lung) is a really good example … when he realised how close he was to not making it, he came out and talked openly about (the trauma of the injury) straight away … that probably wouldn’t have happened 15 or 20 years ago.”
Richardson, an ambassador for not-for-profit Male Hug, an organisation which supports men with a focus on mental health, says it’s vital men know there is someone they can speak to, pointing to the charity’s “Buddy Helpline”.
Sadly, in Australia three quarters of the more than 3,000 lives lost to suicide each year are men.
“(In professional sport) we’re more willing to talk about it than we were … still, the normal Aussie man who is out working 50 hours a week and struggling to make ends meet, who is having issues with his relationship or his work, probably doesn’t have the support he needs and just battles on,” he said.
And what would he tell his younger self?
“I would look back now and go, ‘just make sure you don’t focus too much on the one thing, have your goals and everything, but just be prepared that there can be let downs and disappointments’, because I wouldn’t have been ready for those,” he said.
“I mean, I was lucky that it worked out for me but I did throw all my eggs into one basket … if it had not worked, I would have been absolutely gutted.”
He says he feels “grateful and privileged” to have been able to forge a career in the media post football – still, like every job, there are tough days, especially when he is away from wife Genevieve and their three young daughters, Zoe, 7, Riley, 4, and Ella, 2.
“You’re working in the public eye in everything you do; you’re on air, you’re broadcasting, you’re talking and you’ve got to be up and about, you’ve got to have energy,” he said.
“There have been times when the kids are crook and (Gen’s) run down and you’re interstate … it’s always that little bit of guilt factor when you’re not at home to help.”
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