Father launches campaign to end bullying after daughter’s tragic death

Lacie was kind, outgoing and bubbly, but relentless bullying deteriorated her mental health to breaking point. Now, in her honour, her father is on a mission to attack it head-on in a bid to save others.

Todd Murphy lost his 15-year-old daughter Lacie to suicide. Picture: Adam Head

• Opinion: Too many families shattered

The father of a 15-year-old Gold Coast girl who took her own life says school bullying must be stopped after his “outgoing, bubbly” daughter was “left thinking she had no other option”.

Todd Murphy, whose daughter Lacie May Murphy died by suicide on March 18 after struggling with mental illness and alleged bullying, is calling for more to be done for Queensland children having trouble navigating overwhelming emotions.

Mr Murphy said implementing zero-tolerance measures against bullying, increasing mental health support services and resources, and teaching staff and families how to navigate discussions about mental health were methods educational facilities should consider.

“It is never one thing; it is generally a combination of things. Something happens and your glass gets a little bit fuller and fuller – that is how I see it,” he said.

“Lacie’s cup was overflowing and that was the consequence of her cup overflowing. We just need to catch these kids and empty their cup, and let them realise that we can empty that cup and it will be better. But we let these kids slip through the cracks.”

Lacie Murphy incredibly kind and active, but found “her cup was overflowing”, her father says.

Mr Murphy said he vowed to “find the causes and possible solutions to make sure this never happens again”.

“I intend to find the failings and make any person(s) and/or educational facility that failed to ensure a safe environment for my daughter accountable,” he said. “As a society, we are failing, but we can fix this; we need to fix this.”

Mr Murphy said Lacie, whose death is being investigated by the coroner, was incredibly kind, active and a talented rugby league player.

“She did generally enjoy life to the fullest, and very rarely do you see a photo or video where she wasn’t happy and smiling and being funny,” Mr Murphy said.

“She really enjoyed life and she would always put other people before herself. So very selfless and very dedicated to her friends.”

He said his little girl was a proud First Nations person recognised by the Bunya Lands Council and a beloved member of both the Southport and Port Macquarie communities.

“Lacie played for her much-loved Wauchope Junior Rugby League Club,” he said.

“She loved the offensive and the camaraderie and showed this on and off the field; always standing up for her family and friends, always looking out for others and always making sure everyone else was OK.”

Lacie was a talented rugby league player.

Lacie’s sister, Mikah, was just 20 months older than her, with Mr Murphy describing the pair as “chalk and cheese” but inseparable.

“They absolutely adored each other,” he said.

“You get them together and they fight like cats and dogs, and you get them apart and they cry because they want to be back together.

“They are definitely a funny pair, that is for sure.

“Lacie was the outgoing one and Mikah was the quiet one. You’ve got to have those combinations to have a good life.

“They spent a lot of time together and had a lot of fun.

“Mikah is definitely struggling without her.”

Mr Murphy said more needed to be done for children navigating overwhelming feelings and mental health issues – both at school and outside of it.

Lacie, who attended Southport State High School, was having regular psychological and psychiatric appointments and was also having medication as prescribed by a practitioner.

Mr Murphy said schools and society needed to reinforce to children and teenagers that words can hurt and stick forever.

“I take the strength from Lacie. She would want us to do something,” he said.

“We were working together to fix her issues, and we just didn’t get there. If we can help somebody else, then that is the plan.”

Mr Murphy said he and the rest of Lacie’s family would continue to raise awareness around suicide.

Lacie (right) with her older sister Mikah.

“With mental health and school bullying being significant contributing factors, Lacie’s thoughts overwhelmed her. Lacie was left thinking she had no other option,” he said.

“We just say to anyone who feels like this, don’t give up.

“Please be kind to one another. We need to stop bullying and we need to support each other.”

The Queensland Mental Health Commission reported that from January 1 until February 28 of this year, five children under 18 had died from suspected suicide in the state.

Child psychologist Michael Hawton said tools and strategies should be provided to schools, teachers and parents on how to build resilience and stress management in teens.

“Children of this age are still forming their sense of identity and so while they are doing that, they are trying to work out how they respond to stress,” he said.

“So I think we need to have a lot more resources in place to help young people develop their capacity to manage stress.

“That can happen at a school level, or that can happen between parents.

“I think we have become very good at being empathetic, but we still need to help challenge young people to develop a problem-solving framework.”

Education Minister John-Paul Langbroek extended his deepest and most heartfelt condolences to Lacie’s family, friends and loved ones.

Minister for Education John-Paul Langbroek. Picture: NewsWire / John Gass

“Bullying is a scourge on our society and even one young life lost is too many,” he said.

“It’s clear we must all do more to address this heartbreaking issue and better support our young and vulnerable people to keep them safe.”

A Department of Education spokesman said they recognised that schools – along with parents, carers and the community – played a critical role in supporting young people with their mental health and in raising awareness of the devastating impacts of bullying.

“The department ensures all students have access to wellbeing professionals at school, and additional support is already being provided to students and staff who may have been impacted by this tragedy,” the spokesman said.

“We’re also providing additional training for staff on mental health awareness and recently committed to new anti-bullying initiatives to support the prevention of bullying.”

Originally published as Father launches campaign to end bullying after daughter’s tragic death